Bechloe One-shots
by prettylittlegeek
Summary: Beca and Chloe in different scenarios as one-shots. Most will be K or T, some may be M but will say at the start of the chapter. So far, includes, Sick, Playful smiles Innocent kisses, Don't go Never leave, Induce Me, The First Party and It's Okay!
1. Sick

So, I know I've kinda been gone for a while but I have been writing, I promise! I also discovered that one shots are kinda, maybe my thing? We'll see! There are numerous perspectives in this so please let me know what POV you prefer so I can write like that in the future! Ideas for future one shots are appreciated!

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It had been a long day. Bella rehearsals over-ran by 2 hours, you had spilt coffee down your shirt as you crashed into someone, rushing around. Again. You had been between the libraries, your lectures for the day along with the last midterm before the awaiting week break. Just as the thought of the day being over, finally, crossed your mind you arrive at the Bellas house, finding the group writing a grocery list. _Fucking hell. And 1…2…3._

"Chloe?" Just as predicted.

"Nope, I'm not going to the store," you state firmly, closing the fridge door. You're not usually this rigid, only when someone or something angers you, which isn't that often. Hardly ever, now that you think about it. But that makes you smile as you've always tried to keep yourself in check, even more so when you're around people. Tonight though, there's just that something itching at you. Like that time, you caught chicken pox, significantly later than everyone else, in high school. You just don't have the patience to wait for the itch to ebb away.

"Well there's nothing else here and it can't exactly wait until tomorrow," Fat Amy blabbers away, seeming to take charge of the situation.

 _Are they serious? They can go themselves for fuck sake._ "I actually can't believe this right now. I'm going upstairs and pretending that didn't just come out of your mouth." You're out of the room before anyone could reply, something unusual for you.

 _It's like having kids! I'm there for them, they know that, but this is pushing it now. They don't ask how I am, it's like they don't even care! It's like what? 8pm? Ugh! I'm not their fucking mom, I'm pretty sure they can-_ and that's when the world around you stops.

Chucking your bag and books on your bed across the room, you make your way to Beca's sleeping form in her own bed. It crosses your mind, like it has so many times before, that you and Beca really should push these beds together. You sleep in Beca's bed most of the time anyway. Maybe it's just an excuse to be close. Yeah, definitely that.

The brunette looks peaceful, although you can hear her congested breathing and don't fail to notice the house supply of blankets pilled on the petite girl, who accumulated a slight shiver to her pale body. It reminds you of when you and Beca jumped in the Trebles pool last December and your teeth wouldn't stop chattering all night until Beca had insisted you have a hot bath. Which she ran for you. And yes, the three days following you may have had the worst cold you think you've ever had but you try not to concentrate on that.

Stoking her hair out of the way, you let your hand graze the DJ's head which was too hot to be considered even slightly okay.

Getting up carefully, you make your way into the bathroom and God you're thankful you have the only en-suite in the house. Searching the cupboards, you come up with a thermometer and some medicine for the cough which you know your girlfriend will have.

"Hey, Bec," you say gently, kneeling in front of the bed whilst stroking her hair, attempting to wake her.

Even though you decide to shut up, your hand continues its journey through the brunette locks, slowly awaking the girl. You don't mind the silence though; silence between the two of you has always been comfortable.

"Chloe?" She rasps, her eyes shocked at the light as they eventually open.

"Yeah babe, I'm here," you promise, travelling your hand under the blankets to hold hers.

"Could you turn the light off?" Beca could barely get the words out and it honestly kills you to see her in such a state. And that's when it hits you-you've never saw Beca sick before.

You turn the light off, replacing it with the lamp on your own side of the room, and promptly return to Beca, kneeling on the floor so you can look at her.

"I'm just going to take your temperature, okay?" Receiving a nod, the thermometer gets placed in Beca's mouth and then you lean over to retrieve your notepad and pen. _Well now they have to go to the store._

"God Bec, you've really outdone yourself with that fever," you start, "102.7."

Beca only offered a sad smile. _Bloody hell,_ s _he must be feeling crap if she's not making any jokes about this._

"I feel like shit," she admits quietly, still not removing herself from the cocoon.

"How long have you been here? You should have text me," you whisper, gently running your fingers through the younger girl's hair again. You know she loves it, probably too much too. You knew she adored the feeling before she had admitted it to you, asking you to do it more often. Of course, you do.

"I came home at like 2 and just crashed. I figured I would make use of the quiet." You can tell she's referring to literally everyone else living in the house who, even at night, seem to make the most weird and unnatural sounds. That was part of the reason you wanted to share a room together, you two being the only 'normal' ones, as Beca liked to say, of the house who wanted a break from everything when they decided to call it a night.

"Have you eaten? Thrown up?" The questions would have only run rampant in your brain, coming up with the worst answers and possibilities. It's what your mind does when you're overwhelmed which, you realize, doesn't happen often. You're starting to grasp that you don't get negative emotions a lot.

"Breakfast but I threw up when I came back here," Beca informs, used to your doctor side by now. With a full house who do complicated dances and have busy schedules, it isn't unusual for you to be wrapping a sprain or rubbing backs at the toilet in early hours of the morning. You're most definitely the mom of the group. But you realise that you've never had to do it for Beca as she was never sick, never hurt, she just kind of floated about.

"Okay, I'll be right back," you say as you leave the room quietly, closing the door, list in hand.

Walking down the stairs, you can still hear the voices in the kitchen. _Are they still arguing over this list? I actually live with kids._

"Have any of you seen Beca?" you ask to no one in particular.

They all stay quiet, shaking their heads, seemingly distracted and not interested in you after you refused to go to the store.

"Well Beca's sick upstairs in bed with basically a 103 fever," you start, gaining their attention instantly, "and I'm the last home yet the first to know." They all looked at you with faces in between concern and terror, knowing full well that when you're pissed, which is very infrequent, you're _pissed_.

"To be fair Chloe your room is on the top floor and-"

"I'm not here to fight about it, I just need someone to go to the store while I sort Beca out," cutting Emily off, you place the list of supplies next to the one the group had been writing. You don't want to be rude, you hate being rude, but you think that it's the only way you'll get them to listen. It's a Bella known fact that you handle the Beca situations-you're the only one who knows how. And honestly? The other Bellas wouldn't have a clue how to go about calming Beca when she goes off on a rage or when she just curls up in bed all day because, like Beca has told you so many times, sometimes she just has bad days. And yeah, they are worse than most other people's but you can usually convince her to eat something and let you in to her cocoon so you don't mind those days so much.

"Okay, I'll go when they finish the list. How is she?" Cynthia Rose asks, making you smile. The girl always did have a helpful, serious side.

"Not good. I've never even heard of her being sick before, let alone see it, but she's _sick."_ You can tell they've understood you by some of their faces. No one had heard of Beca even with a cold before this.

"Alright, Chloe, we got this, go sort your girl out," CR continues, pulling you off to the side slightly and placing a rough yet somehow soft hand on your back. You really need to show the girl how much you appreciate her more often, you decide.

"Thank you."

When you re-enter the loft, you find the younger women sat up slightly on her elbows, coughing loudly. You're not sure how you didn't hear her from downstairs but the thought quickly evaporates as you rush across the room, planting yourself on the edge of the bed, gently rubbing and patting her back until the coughing stops. You pass her some cough medicine and water to smooth her throat.

"Thanks, Chlo," Beca whispers, using you to keep herself upright. Her voice sounds rougher and you can tell it's only a matter of time before it dissipates completely.

"Why don't we get you dressed?" you suggest, leaving no room for argument but Beca knows you're really talking to yourself. It often happened; your thoughts coming out as words before you can even think-but you know Beca loves it so why put effort in to stop it?

You help Beca up so her legs hang off the side of the bed. You always do make fun of how she can't touch the ground. You can tell Beca's confused when you turn back to her with her favourite top and shorts, which were previously across the room, without letting her fall. You have your ways.

Beca doesn't pay much attention to what you're doing, it isn't hard to see that, she just simply lets you adjust her in order to get her changed. You guide her to lay back down and watch her close her eyes. Somehow, you don't know how, you understand that the brunette isn't sleeping but blocking out the light from the room as her face screws up in slight pain, as if she was scratching her nose.

You manage to get yourself dressed in similar attire before turning the light off and climbing in bed with Beca. As you get into the bed, preparing yourself to have Beca clutch to you, you feel her gravitate away from you, towards the wall. You can only guess that your girlfriend wants her space but for some reason, you had always pinned her as the touchy type when sick.

She's always touchy with you now. You'll admit that it hadn't always been like that but it had been since the two of you had become close and even more so when you started dating. It only shows when you're alone though, a fact you smile at, as Beca would be mortified if the Bella's found out about it. Because you have definitely _not_ told them all and sworn them to secrecy or anything. Definitely _not_.

But you just can't understand how Beca's not cuddling into you right now. So, you being a Beale, you prop yourself so your leaning back against the pillows and pull Beca towards you, guiding her head down to rest just under your collar bone as you begin to trace your fingers over her back.

"You're going to get sick," Beca mumbles as she starts to pull away from the embrace only to be kept firmly in place by yourself.

"I'll be fine. I'm more worried about you," you whisper, but you start to wonder if that was the right thing to say as you know Beca doesn't like to cause any worry for anyone, including yourself. But you don't care if you get sick. You need to be with her right now.

"Just let me look after you, Mitchell." You know she'll listen if you go on long enough.

You lay in silence for a while, not wanting to disturb, what looks like, Beca's peaceful state she has developed.

When a soft knock sounds, you feel Beca flinch a little and you know that she had almost fell asleep.

"Come in," you call out softly, still not stopping your finger movements on Beca's back.

Watching Cynthia Rose slowly make her way in the room, obviously not knowing Beca's state of consciousness, you point to the lamp, signalling for the other girl to light it up.

"I got everything you asked but some things I wasn't sure so I just got what I thought was best?" It's clear that she doesn't have a clue what she's doing.

"No, yeah, that's fine. Thank you." You smile gratefully, never realising how helpful the girl was. Wow, you feel like a dick.

Just as the bigger woman is about to turn to leave, a breath sounds from Beca's mouth while her body winces in your arms. You panic immediately. Who wouldn't, right?

"Beca, what's wrong? What hurts?" You ask, rather rushed, before you can even think of the words. The whole thing reminds you of when your sister had exceptionally bad cramps as a teen and your mother would sit with her on the bed, smoothing her hair and rubbing her back until the wincing stopped. You're lucky enough that you don't get bad cramps, thank the heavens.

Your only guess to Beca's silence is that she simply can't answer. Of course, it only worries you more. You try to not let it show but it's kinda hard when your girlfriend won't talk to you and-. Your thoughts and your apparently dream like state are cut off as you feel the other woman poking you and gesturing to where Beca had started to cling to her stomach.

"Pass me some pain killers?" you request, gesturing to the bag while gently prying Beca's arm away from her waist and helping her sit up slightly. You try to be gentle, you really try, but you can't help but notice Beca's pained expressions as you move her.

"Becs, I need you to take these for me, okay?" After receiving a forced nod from Beca, you raise the pills up to her mouth, followed by some water.

Giving Beca a minute, you hand the bottle back to CR. After that, you seem to block everything else out, as if everything is blurry but the girl in your arms. Almost like those amazing photos which Ashley takes and puts on Instagram, where everything is blurred but the person.

At this point, Beca can only produce shaky breaths as she tries to collect herself and you're only too happy to accept her as she returns to cuddle into your side.

"Better?" you ask, placing a kiss on her hairline.

"Yeah, thank you," Beca tries to speak but her voice is raspy and quiet. You didn't really expect her to answer with words.

You look up then, expecting to see Cynthia Rose still stood there. But all you find is the bag she had brought, by your side.

"Why don't you try and get some sleep? It might help."

Beca gives a nod, melting into you as she attempts to relax.

You soon feel her body go limp against yours, allowing yourself to relax slightly.

No matter how long you try to convince yourself to relax, all you can seem to think about is the symptoms and what illnesses they matched up to, desperate to help the brunette next to you. You know you're being over dramatic; it was probably just a case of flu, right? _For God's sake Chloe-it's the flu. Definitely the flu. I'm probably going to catch it-then Beca will have to take care of me. Like last time. God, Beale, stop being so selfish!_

An hour into your thoughts, you find yourself drifting off, holding Beca closer to you than usual.

It seemed like a total of 10 minutes that you had been asleep when your awoken, glancing at the clock to reveal it was just past 3am. It's then that you notice the bathroom light leaking under the door, sending a glow across the room, and the light indent in the bed of where Beca used to be. Usually the roles are swapped, you're usually the one who gets up in the middle of the night if it's anyone. You know that once Beca's out, she's out.

Listening carefully as you make your way to the door, you can't actually hear anything from inside the bathroom. No movement. Anything. You would just go in if you hadn't had that talk about boundaries a couple weeks ago.

"Hey, babe, you okay?" you ask, lightly tapping on the door.

"Chloe." It's filled with a breath and was probably too quiet to be considered a whisper but you somehow hear it. Maybe it was the desperation that encased it. A plead. An unasked question that the girl wanted help to which you plan on giving to the best of your ability.

"Oh God, Bec, why didn't you wake me?" you say as you enter, rushing over to the brunette. Beca had somehow slumped down the wall next to the toilet, her knees to her chest with her cheek rested on top, facing towards the door.

As you reach her, her body jerks forward, another bout of sickness overcoming her. You react quickly, used to people throwing up now, rubbing her back and holding the hairs that had escaped the messy bun back. When it seems like she's finished, you pull her back into your arms so she can comfortably lay against you. You don't say anything, neither does she, but you think that's for the best so you just allow Beca to lean against you how she wants.

And that's where you stay until you know that you've been there too long to be considered okay. You know it's early, the sun just coming up and starting to spread across the room, and that's what clues you in to the unacceptable time you had been there. Beca had thrown up, you guessed, maybe twice an hour every hour. But things were looking up as Beca had been resting against you for the longest time yet, fast asleep.

 _Someone send Stacie, I repeat STACIE, up here please. ASAP!_ You send to the Bellas group chat. Someone had to be awake.

You hear a bang from downstairs and then a scurry of feet making their way to the first level, where Stacie's room is. A feeling of guilt appears; you know that Stacie won't be awake yet, heck, she could sleep until noon. And she did. On a regular occurrence.

"Chloe, this better be good," Stacie mumbles as you hear her light footsteps across your room. You only offer a sad smile as Stacie joins you on the floor, facing you and Beca. You wait for her to talk but it never comes so you just watch as her hand slowly raises and tucks a loose strand of hair behind Beca's ear.

"Sorry, I just-I know she wouldn't want anyone else to see her like this," you quietly explain, knowing Stacie wasn't going to talk anytime soon.

"It's fine, Chlo, what do you need?"

"Could you grab the bucket from downstairs, a bottle of water and possibly some tea and put them next to the bed please?"

"Yeah, sure. Are you sure there's nothing else I can do?" Stacie questions, starting to stand up and head towards the door.

"No, that's good. Thank you, Stace."

Stacie's out before you know it and you're left alone with Beca. Keeping Beca asleep is a hard task in itself but moving her? Simply dangerous. But you somehow manage it with only a slight stir from Beca as you reach the bed.

"Amy-I don't think-" Stacie's cut off by a shriek as the door slams open. "For fuck sake Amy!"

"Hey, stop blaming the Tasmanian," Fat Amy counters as she hoists herself back up.

"Oh my god, we're so sorry," Stacie eventually says as she and Amy make their way into room.

You have resumed your half and half position against the pillows with Beca cuddled into your side, head resting on your shoulder and arm slung around your waist. Magically, you had managed to get Beca settled without awakening her but now the brunette looked almost drowsy with her eyes fluttering.

"Really Stace, really," you reply, obviously pissed that she had picked Fat Amy of all people to help her.

"How you doing, midget?" Amy try's to be caring.

"Mmhmm," Beca hums, only to clutch at her throat, not expecting the pain.

"Stace, pass me that," you say, gesturing to the tea.

"Here, Becs," you continue as you pass the mug to Beca.

You could tell by the look on her face that it burned her throat. Or it hurt to swallow. Maybe both.

Lying back in your arms again, blanket tucked under her chin, her drowsy state soon engulfs her as she falls asleep within a matter of seconds. After seeing Beca had fallen asleep, you quickly shoo the other two out, not wanting to disturb your girlfriend's much needed sleep.

Its hours later when you eventually wake Beca, pushing the brunette to eat something. Beca, being as whipped as she was, couldn't say no to the blue eyes but that didn't mean she wanted to. You could tell it was quite the opposite actually.

You manage to get her to eat some soup and drink a bit, saying she needs to replace the fluids she had lost.

Both fall asleep for the night pretty quickly, some of the Bellas even coming to find Chloe only to discover she too was asleep. They let them be though, agreeing to keep the house as quiet as possible as all knew about the previous night, knowing how exhausted the two must be.

The morning after however, no one was ready for. Beca's fever had increased significantly from where it had gone down the previous night to the point where Chloe was debating on whether to take her to the hospital. This was after Beca had refused to see a doctor. Along with that, Stacie had also spent the night throwing up, Aubrey helping her through it as she had arrived late that night to see her girlfriend only to discover that she too was down with the sickness.

Cynthia Rose had suggested to put both girls on the top floor, where Chloe and Beca's room was, but both girls wanted their own space and bed, effectively causing the other Bellas to maneuver themselves. Lily, Stacie's roomy, had been moved to Ashley and Jessica's room as they had both left for the week while everyone else on the second floor took the spare beds on the first, not wanting to spread or catch the illness. So, quarantine was the only option.

"Beca, I really think we should go to the hospital," you continue. You can tell Beca really does admire your perseverance.

"Chlo, I'll be fine." Beca tries brushing it off as if her voice isn't basically non-existent and isn't the owner of a 104 fever.

"Becs," you say warningly, "you're really sick." And that's when you can finally see Beca give in, realise, that she's not as good as she says.

"If it gets that bad, I'll tell you, I promise. You can take me to the hospital then, okay?"

You can hear that the brunette's voice won't last much longer so ultimately decide that arguing is pointless and that you should just hold on to the fact that Beca will get better with rest. "Just sleep for now," you basically command, your hand running through Beca's hair.

You stay until Beca drifts off, leaving the room and making your way to the kitchen. You're aware that you had completely forgotten about yourself the past few days, food wise anyway, so decide grilled cheese would probably be good-that's until you reach the kitchen. You soon realise that the bar stool was a better option than actually making something, deciding to lay your head down in your arms.

You're not sure how much time passes when a hand touches your back, slowly moving in soothing circles. You know who it is without having to look.

"How's Stacie?" you ask, your head still in place on the counter.

"She's okay. Not half as bad as Beca apparently is."

"She's just so stubborn. She has a 104 fever Bree! 104! Yet she refuses to go to a doctor," you say, your voice cracking slightly. You know it's only a matter of time before the tears will come.

"Hey Chlo, she'll be fine. There's no need for tears, you're okay," Aubrey comforts, taking you into her arms as the tears start. Not many people have saw you cry, you always like to keep your sensitive, emotional side tucked away. The only Bellas who have seen it are perhaps Beca and Aubrey-you can't be sure. But it's not like you cry all that much anyway, mainly when you're stressed and tired. You don't really get upset enough to get to the wet cheeks stage.

"I know, I'm just being silly," you respond, pulling away and wiping away the escaped tears.

"I think you're just tired and hungry and maybe a tad delirious…am I right?" Aubrey asks softly.

"Probably, yeah." you wipe the remaining tears away and go to stand from the stool only to be pushed back down by Aubrey.

"You sit there while I make you something to eat." Normally you would protest but the lack of energy makes you offer a grateful smile.

You watch as Aubrey walks over to the fridge, emerging herself in whatever's in there, before letting your head drop and closing your eyes.

"Chlo…Chloe." You don't realise you've fallen asleep until Aubrey's gently waking you. "Here, eat and then we'll get you to bed," she continues, pushing a plate towards you.

"Thank you," you breathe. God, you're grateful Aubrey chose this weekend to visit.

"It's fine Chlo. I'll be right back, I'm just going to go and check on Stace."

"Check on Beca too please," you call after her, hoping she would do as asked. They were friends now after all. After Bhloe, in the words of Fat Amy, had become a thing after Worlds, you had sat Aubrey down and made her agree to be nice to the girl, as you did with Beca. Having your best friend and girlfriend bickering is not something you want.

"They're both fast asleep. It's kind of cute actually, Beca has filled I'm guessing where you were led with a pillow and has a death grip on it so good luck getting back in." Aubrey chuckles at your face as she spoke. Your face says it all.

"This happens literally all the time, I leave for 5 minutes and the lil bitch has already replaced me," you play along.

"Anyway, you and I both need to go to bed, I'm pretty sure everyone else went to some party so I'm going to make use of the quiet as I'm sure they won't be back anytime tonight," Aubrey declares as you both stand from your respective seats.

"Good idea," you whisper as you place your plate in the sink.

"Make sure to take some medicine before you go to sleep, I can tell you're beginning to come down with something and God help me if I have to care for 3 of you," Aubrey gently says as you reach the top floor. She tells you to get a good night's sleep and to call her if you need anything at which you nod, assuring her you will.

Sure enough, there Beca was, pillow tightly attached to her. You would be lying if you said you didn't find it adorable. You somehow manage to replace the pillow with yourself, wrapping your arms around Beca and pulling the covers slightly higher. You find yourself drifting off almost immediately.

"Chlo…Chloe, baby, wake up." Beca gently wakes her from where she rests on her chest. Sometime in the night Beca had woken and heard Chloe's breathing along with the gentle, subconscious nudges the redhead gave her, trying to get closer. Long story short, Beca had swapped their positions so Chloe was comfortably cuddled into her side.

"Becs?" she rasps out quietly, the sleep coming through to her voice. She knew Beca was worried; she only calls Chloe 'Baby' when she's upset or ill.

"You're feeling warm, babe. You feeling alright?" She looks down at Chloe, seeing she can barely keep her eyes open which only worries the brunette more.

"No," she whispers quietly. Chloe knows she should be asking how Beca is as she can hear that although her voice has returned it is nowhere near where it should be but she honestly doesn't have the energy to lie in saying she feels the slightest bit alright.

"Aubrey's going to bring some tea up for us, okay? I know your throat is killing," Beca states confidently, even with her voice sounding as if she smoked a 50 pack a day. Despite that, Chloe had to give her credit, the redhead didn't notice Beca reach for the phone. She didn't even see her text Aubrey for God's sake.

Pain aside, because, yes, her throat hurt like a bitch, courtesy of her nodes surgery, she's surprised that Beca knows. Can tell. Although, it's not like this hasn't happened before. Whenever she got a cold, which was frequent when living with a group of girls, it always seemed to bother her throat. And it wasn't just a sore throat. Chloe can remember when she had literally cried and cried to Beca about it, explaining it felt exactly like how it did when she had the worst of her nodes. Of course, Beca, being Beca, took her to the doctor who said it was just because of her surgery and was normal-there was nothing she could do about it.

Chloe only nods as she reattaches her head with her girlfriend's chest, slowly letting her eyes close. The next thing she's aware of, she wouldn't know the amount of time that past, is a cold hand on her forehead. It feels soothing on her skin yet sends shivers down her already ice body. She shifts at the feeling, slowly opening her eyes again to see the culprit, even though she could have guessed.

"Oh Chlo," Aubrey whispers from where she's perched on the side of the bed, the same side which Chloe's body lays. Although, the redhead isn't quite sure it would count, she's more on Beca's body than a side. Whose she kidding? Beca is her side.

Beca and Aubrey-mainly the latter-help sit Chloe up, half on Beca and half on the pillows. Someone hands her the cup of tea, she's not completely sure who, and she starts to take small sips.

"How're you feeling?" Aubrey asks as she hands Beca her own cup.

"Like I'm going to throw up any moment now but I'll be fine. I'm more worried about this one," Beca rasps, moving her arm to lazily lay around Chloe's shoulders as the redhead shuffles down and rests just below Beca's shoulder.

Aubrey's just concerned about Chloe's response. Or lack of.

"Is there anything I can get for you, Chlo?" Aubrey try's. Chloe only shakes her head softly, letting her head eventually fall against Beca's chest. Aubrey takes Chloe's cup; she's already falling asleep and will inevitably spill it.

The day continues like that. Chloe's in an almost drowsy state so Beca thinks sleeping will do the trick. So, that's what they do. No one pukes so everyone considers that progress. By evening, Chloe's more with it and actually talking, despite Beca telling her not to.

And then everything goes to shit.

First, Chloe wakes Beca, who had gone to sleep with a migraine. But Beca didn't care about that, Chloe's crying and complaining that her stomachs being eaten alive-Beca thinks that's the worst description the redhead could have given but can't exactly ignore her. And then Chloe's puking in the bucket, Beca rubbing her back and whispering sweet nothings into her ear in-between rounds. When they both pass out from exhaustion, sleep coming easy, it's only a few hours until Beca's awake, nudging her girlfriend as she lunges for the bucket. And yes, yes, they did clean it…after Aubrey refused to do so at 2am. So, of course, Chloe rubbed her girlfriends back and guided her into her arms when done.

Both thanked their lucky stars when no one had puked again when they woke up at 2 that afternoon. So, the next few days are spent cuddling in bed with tea and movies-Chloe's idea-while both rid the symptoms left.


	2. Playful smiles, Innocent kisses

Okay so this chapter is definitely nearing the M rating;) Just a warning. I'm trying to stay on top of this whole writing thing but it's hard to find time so chapters may just come when they come. Sorry.

I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter so let me know what you think? As always, I'm open to idea's or ways to improve my writing-just drop a comment or PM me:) Hope you enjoy!

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 _Becs: We still on for dinner tonight?_ Chloe immediately smiled.

 _Obviously! We can't be lonely alone!_

 _Becs: You have a good point, Red. I guess I can tolerate you for a while._

 _Always a charmer, Becs._

 _Becs: You know it ;)_

With that, Chloe shut off her phone, attempting to concentrate on the lecture. She failed miserably. In the two hours she sat there, Chloe managed to pick up the name Edward Jenner and something about chromosomes from her professor; getting distracted by a certain brunette. Chloe knew her feelings went far deeper than a little crush, she was absolutely, 100% in love with Beca Mitchell. The worst part? She didn't want to stop it. She wanted to scream it from the fucking roof tops and hope that maybe, just maybe, Beca would feel the same. But she couldn't, shouldn't, and wouldn't do that. Their friendship was too special to even think about ruining it and honestly? Chloe wouldn't deny that she had spent countless nights thinking and possibly crying (she wouldn't admit that part) over this freaking tiny brunette she called her best friend. Apart from Aubrey of course. Another problem. They had just about learned how to tolerate each other, dating Beca would only flare up more shit that, although Chloe would argue was worth it to be with the brunette, she couldn't be fucked to deal with any of it. She had had enough of that from the day Beca arrived on campus.

By the time the lecture had ended and she made it to Baker Hall Chloe had gone over every single scenario to be with Beca. Every single fucking one. It only confused her more. Maybe frustrated is a better word? She didn't know. Nor did she care at this point. She was here, about to spend time with Beca and she couldn't let herself get trapped in her thoughts. Their time together was special and she wasn't going to waste it. Just knock on the fucking door, Beale.

"Coming," she heard Beca shout, followed by a bang, making Chloe smile. Classic Beca. "Oh my God, do my eyes deceive me or did Chloe Beale herself knock! Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?"

"Ha-ha, very funny," she shot back, her voice dripping in sarcasm at the obvious joke towards her lack of personal boundaries. She's trying.

"So, what do you want to order for our special Valentine's Day feast?" Beca asks as she sits in her desk chair, spinning in circles.

"I don't know but I'm thinking we should go big, it is Valentine's Day after all and I'm fucking beat," she answers, falling onto Beca's bed face first.

"Okay, wow, now I'm worried. You knocked and now you're saying fucking. I don't think I've ever heard you say that…oh my god, Chloe, I've never heard you say that!" She actually seemed shocked and Chloe had to smile at the look on her face, she seemed genuinely concerned and maybe…confused?

"I'm a changed woman," she states confidently. Beca just scoffs as a reply, letting out a little laugh with it.

"Well, Miss Beale, could you decide on what it is you would like to eat?" she asks in a formal tone, imitating a waitress.

"Hmm…Chinese?"

"Sure, I'll phone and order a feast for us."

"I love how you don't even ask what I want," Chloe says, a smile on her face, looking at Beca with her phone to her ear.

"We've ordered too many times, I know exactly what you like."

An hour later, they're sat on the floor surrounded by empty Chinese food containers and wrappers, the only light source, other than the laptop that is, being the small lamp planted on the desk.

"I think that's one of the best meals I've ever eaten," Chloe says as she starts standing up.

"That says a lot coming from you. I still don't understand how you eat so much yet you look like you do," Beca says as she leans back, practically lying in the middle of the floor.

"Is Beca Mitchell calling me hot right now?" Chloe makes a fake surprise face, shooting Beca a playful smile as she leans over Beca's computer.

"Hey, Beale, what are you doing? You know I don't like anyone touching that," Beca starts to get wary. She trusts Chloe but that doesn't stop the reflex.

"Chill, Mitchell, just putting on some music."

"Okay, just make sure it's decent music," she gives in as she watches Chloe hook up the water speakers-it always did amuse the redhead-and click play.

"No. Nu-uh. Not happening," Beca quickly takes back, standing.

"Come on, Becs, you know I love this song!" Chloe defends, starting to dance to the music.

"Yeah, that's the problem, you love it too much, Miss Lady Jam," she shoots back, searching for a new song on the computer.

"Just dance with me, come on," Chloe says as she tugs Beca away from the laptop with a groan. "I won't try anything on you, I promise…unless you want me to that is," she shoots Beca another playful smile as Beca laughs quietly, thinking she was joking about this whole thing. God, Chloe wishes she was joking.

So Beca finally agrees as Chloe takes her hand, dancing separately but their hands connecting their movements as the remix of Titanium flows around the room. But Chloe's smart. She knows that Beca won't blink an eyelash if Chloe slowly gets closer to her. Beca almost expects it from Chloe.

As the fast beat starts up, a part requested by Chloe herself, the closeness begins to become more apparent as Chloe's back moves inches away from the brunette's chest. But Beca encourages it, much to Chloe's surprise, as she grabs the redhead's waist while Chloe speeds the movement of her hips to match the beat.

It isn't the first time they've danced so intimately, this is a monthly occurrence, at least, when the Bellas go out clubbing, a tradition which no one dares to break, but it's only ever been in big groups of people while they're intoxicated by alcohol. Never has it happened when they're both fully sober and alone. It feels more intimate and special, Chloe decides.

When the sped-up chorus picks back up, both girls are belting out the words, smiles spread across their face as they dance together. Chloe almost manages to convince herself that this is what normal friends do, dancing so close, but the thoughts gone as soon as it comes.

Beca only flusters her more, pulling her closer, somehow, to the point where Chloe can feel her breath on her neck.

Both girls know that this isn't normal. Far from it.

But then the music slows and before Chloe can think about it, Beca's slowly spinning her in circles. It feels magical and right, God, it feels so, so right. Like Chloe was made just to live this moment. So, she gives in and smiles, her eyes closed, as she tilts her head towards her hand attached to Beca's above.

Opening them as she comes to a stop, Chloe's met with Beca's eyes, staring straight into hers. Beca's hand is resting on her waist, holding her in place, while the other is still intertwined with Chloe's own. Chloe didn't even realise until now that her own hand had gravitated to Beca's neck. They're swaying slightly to the left-over music flowing through the room. But neither girl is bothered about that. They're eyes haven't left each other.

Chloe's not completely sure but she's pretty sure Beca steals a glance at her lips and before she has time to contemplate it, Beca's lips are on hers. She's not even sure who initiated it, it could have been both of them. But she's kissing Beca.

Beca fucking Mitchell.

The first thing she feels is just how soft Beca's lips are and then both of her hands are on Beca's neck, her fingers fiddling with the hair that's come loose from the brunette's messy bun. Beca's hands are on her waist, holding her in place, one of her thumbs stroking Chloe's skin where her top's rode up.

They start to edge towards the bed, taking slow steps together as their bodies move against one another. And sure, they're stepping on leftover Chinese boxes and probably food but neither can find it within themselves to care. Their lips break apart for a blink of an eye as Chloe's back hits the mattress and Beca climbs on top of her, carefully holding her weight on one arm. And their lips just gravitate towards one another. Like magnets. Chloe thinks for a second, just one, that they've done this a million and ten times before and she almost convinces herself that they have with how natural this all feels. Almost. Because the foreign yet amazing feel of Beca's lips reminds her that this is new and exciting and she's kissing Beca fucking Mitchell for the first time.

Before Chloe knows it, their tongues are in a war and Beca's thigh is raising in between her legs. And Chloe knows she should stop it and they should talk but god damn it she doesn't want to. She just wants to stay in this moment, kissing Beca, for the rest of her life. But then Beca's leg is moving slightly and Chloe only realises then that Beca's not the only one moving. She lets out a hmm that's half a moan before she can even think about it and Beca only smiles against her lips.

"Becs," Chloe says against her lips as she gently places her hands on Beca's shoulders.

"Chlo," Beca basically repeats in the same tone. Chloe only rolls her eyes with a playful smile.

"Don't you think we should talk about this?"

"Dude, I think we were communicating just fine." Another eye roll.

"Seriously Becs, what does this mean? Are we like together now? Like, what's happening here?" Okay so Chloe may be freaking just a tad.

"It's a I wanna be with you and you wanna be with me, that's what's happening Chlo," Beca explains simply.

"You just avoided half of my questions and who says I wanna be with you Mitchell?" Chloe gives her a teasing smile from below as Beca fakes a surprised face.

"Well, I know you Beale and you wouldn't make out with anyone you don't want to be with so I'm going to take that as a hint…Look, Chlo I wanna be with you and if you do too then I wanna do this." It surprises Chloe just how much emotion Beca puts in.

"I wanna be with you too," Chloe all but whispers, pulling Beca's chin towards her to place a single kiss on her lips.

Everything slowed in that moment, Chloe's eyes still closed below Beca, as Beca's thumb grazes her hair line before rolling to lie on her side beside Chloe.

Chloe just keeps her eyes closed. She can tell Beca's staring at her but she's kind of enjoying it. Loving it. She almost convinces herself to open her eyes before Beca's placing light kisses on her shoulder, trailing up to her jaw.

She still hasn't opened her eyes. Instead, let's out a sign of contentment, somehow trying to let Beca know that she's more than okay with this. Chloe knows she's received the message when she feels Beca's smile against her skin, continuing to kiss up to her ear.

"Enjoying this are we, Beale?" Beca eventually whispers in her ear; the smirk on her face evident in her tone. Chloe only hums in response, a small smile overcoming her own face.

Yet, her eyes are still closed.

Beca's hands start to make their way up Chloe's top, resting on the redhead's stomach, as the kisses continue over her neck. Beca's fingers start to move and then Chloe's screaming and laughing as Beca's tickling her.

"Beca…Beca stop!" Chloe cries in between laughs.

"Sorry, what was that? You want me to carry on? Well, okay, if you insist." Chloe did always say Beca wouldn't be Beca without the sarcasm.

"No…no, stop!"

Despite Chloe's best efforts, Beca only stopped when she was sure Chloe was about to pee herself.

"I'll get you back for that Mitchell," Chloe all but panted when Beca stopped.

"If I live to see the day," Beca retorted from where she was straddling Chloe.

Oh, and there's the eye roll again.

"Come here," she whispers from under Beca.

So, Beca moves her body down Chloe's until her face is in front of the redheads and one legs placed in-between Chloe's.

"What can I do for you, Red?" the brunette whispers as she rests her forehead against the woman beneath her.

Chloe only tilts her chin, connecting their lips.

But this time's different. More serious. But Chloe's pretty sure she meant for that to happen. Yep, 100% her intentions.

It doesn't take them long to get into a comfortable rhythm, tongues in a war and hands travelling over and under clothes. Chloe's fiddling with the hem of Beca's top in hopes the brunette will get the message; she doesn't want to force it off her, she has no idea how far Beca wants to go with this. But Beca's also massaging Chloe's waist where her top has raised. So, she takes that as a hint that Beca's okay and starts to lift her top up the brunette's body and God she's thankful when Beca sits ups, removes her arms and pulls her head through. Chloe only follows her body, sitting up with Beca, which results with Beca's knee right on Chloe's core-but she's okay with it. And Beca seems to be too. If her kissing has anything to do with it-she's definitely okay with it.

Chloe knows that it's way too obvious that Beca's knee is doing things to her-things that just shouldn't be happening with this level of contact. But it's not like she can control it. Neither does she want to. But Chloe can only tell how transparent she is when Beca lightly smiles into the kiss as her knee starts to move.

And then Chloe can't deal with it anymore.

She quickly breaks the kiss, removes her hands from Beca to pull her own top over her head before connecting their lips together, all a bit frantic for Chloe's liking but she doesn't care. Not right now. She needs to feel Beca's skin against hers.

In one swift motion, she flips Beca over onto her back, so she can straddle the brunette, one leg either side of Beca's hips. Leaning down, her body flush against Beca's, she reconnects their lips, all while spreading her fingers over Beca's rib cage in an attempt to keep herself steady. And then she realises she can't.

Feeling Beca's body begin to grind against her, and her own reciprocating, Chloe moves her lips down the girl's neck, urging herself not to leave any marks. Beca would kill her. But that doesn't stop the craving because God Chloe just wants to leave marks over every inch of skin, truly marking Beca as her own. But she can't. So, she just keeps kissing her way across Beca's collarbone and down the valley of her breasts, slowing, unsure of herself, when her kisses move to the edge of the brunette's black bra. She doesn't want to move it in fear of pushing Beca too far. So, naturally, her eyes move up to seek for reassurance, only to be met with Beca staring right back at her, more love in her eyes than Chloe thinks she's ever seen in a person.

"You can take it off," Beca whispers so quietly, Chloe's not sure if she heard her right.

"Are-are you sure?" Chloe stutters, making it a bit too obvious that she's just slightly nervous.

"Chlo, I trust you," Beca says, so confidently that Chloe can't remember the girl whose walls were 10 feet high.

They hold eye contact until Chloe's lips are inches from Beca's and she slowly lowers herself to push her lips against Beca's. There was no movement, not by their lips anyway. Chloe pulls back after a moment, only barely though, so there's enough breathing space to whisper, "I trust you too."

And then her lips are taking a familiar path down Beca's neck, to her collarbone. Her lips carry on moving as she pulls Beca up to a sitting position, herself straddled in the brunette's lap where she's forced to disconnect her lips.

Again, they hold eye contact, like they're in the deepest conversation of their lives, yet no words are being spoken. Chloe's the one to lean forward, resting her forehead against Beca's. And both of them are just in that moment, in their bubble; nothing can touch them. Beca's hands are wrapped around Chloe's waist, her finger's tracing patterns on the redhead's lower back, like she's trying to reassure Chloe, and herself, that everything's okay. Which they are. Chloe's hands are tracing Beca's bra, and Beca can tell that she's still unsure of herself. She wants to do this, of course she does, but she can't get rid of the doubt that Beca's not okay with this, like she wants to run for the hills like she always does. So Beca moves her hands to copy the redhead's actions. Any move Chloe makes, Beca does too.

So, Chloe gravitates to the clasp and smoothly snaps it open, and her own blue bra makes the same sound a moment after.

Both garments fall off easily and are quickly pushed off the bed, the girls falling back onto the bed in a mess of limbs and connected lips.

The desperation gets to them then; the pace quickens, and kisses become almost messy and sloppy-but they're still in that moment. Beca's unbuttoning Chloe's jeans from above as Chloe's fingers are gripping and smoothing over any of Beca's skin she can reach, in a desperate mission to let Beca know that she's ready and she freakin wants this. Like a lot. Her finger tips trace onto Beca's side, eventually leading up and around her sensitive nub before spreading her palm across and giving her a gentle squeeze, all while pushing her body up and kissing Beca with a hell of a lot more force than before.

The brunette's back arches downward into Chloe's touch, her hand slipping under her jeans and resting at the redhead's panties. Chloe herself isn't sure how much more she can take; she can feel _that_ feeling deep in the pit of her stomach, waving down to her core and making her crave Beca more than ever before.

"Becs," she lets out against Beca's lips. It's a plea, both know it, but Chloe didn't even realise it came out until it slipped past her lips. But Beca responds, knowing the meaning behind it that Chloe needed her right now and quite frankly, Beca wasn't sure how much longer she would last either.

Chloe feels Beca's hand lower and eventually generate soft circles over her panties and she has to admit that she struggles immensely to continue kissing Beca. But Beca, and Chloe couldn't be more thankful in that moment, understands and trails her lips down the redhead's neck and reaches her nipple, twirling her tongue and giving it a slight suck. Knuckles become white as Chloe's finger's curl around the bed sheets and her other hand seeks Beca's in an attempt to anchor herself, even in the slightest, to this moment.

And Beca grips to Chloe's hand like a lifeline; when she watches Chloe's head dig into the pillow, when she places light kisses to the redhead's stomach, and when some of those light kisses turn into desperate sucks that Beca knows will leave a mark. She only releases Chloe's hand when she starts the mission of getting her jeans off. And under the immense pleasure, Chloe can't help but berate herself for wearing jeans on today of all days-the ultimate cockblocker when it comes to sex.

The jeans come off, surprisingly, with ease and they're soon skin to skin again. Chloe loves it; feeling Beca's light weight on top of her and her warm skin blanketing her from above.

Hands roam each other's stomachs, torsos and back, latching onto one another like the other will disappear any minute. But they also know that no one is going anywhere. It's a weird feeling.

Chloe's soon regaining control, flipping Beca over and fiery, red hair coming down to fall over her shoulders. Her hands continue their journey down Beca's stomach and start to edge Beca's sweats down, a smile overcoming her as she reminds herself of what they're actually doing. She's undressing Beca fucking Mitchell-who wouldn't smile at that?

Once the sweats are off, Chloe returns to Beca, one knee beside each hip as she hovers over Beca. The brunette's hands gravitate to Chloe's core again, creating soft circles over the fabric. And then Beca's pushing them aside and inserting her fingers into her folds and Chloe won't lie, it surprised her how bold Beca was being with this. But, God it felt good.

Chloe tries to kiss Beca back, she really does, but it's just not possible after a while. Their foreheads rest against one another instead, breaths mingling together, and Chloe feels bad because she needs to give Beca something. She wants to give Beca something.

Slowly, Chloe lowers herself down to put more weight onto Beca and the bed, but she never lets their foreheads disconnect. Through her heavy breaths and gasps, she can make out her hand moving down Beca's body and slipping inside Beca's own Black boxer shorts. It's a strange experience to say the least. Because, yes, Chloe had been with other girls-not many but enough- after actually realising that she was bi, but Beca was different. A whole new level of a game that Chloe didn't even realise she was playing. And she says that simply because she had thought of this moment, maybe dreamt of it a few times, from the moment she saw the little alt girl at the activities fair and even more so when she'd caught a glimpse in the showers. So, yes, Chloe had waited a long time for this.

But feeling Beca, really feeling her, is something totally new and brilliant. She can feel the change in Beca's breathing when her fingers slide into her folds and she lets on finger slide down into Beca. And that's when Beca breaks. She lets out a throaty moan, the first one she's made in this whole experience, and it hits Chloe like a brick wall. Something switches, and Chloe's more turned on than she thinks she's ever been, which says a lot. She's pretty sure Beca notices too as her hand speeds up and she takes the risk of kissing Chloe again before kissing any skin she can reach.

Chloe's so incredibly close that she almost abandons her Beca duties but quickly speeds up at the realisation, inserting and curling her fingers expertly as they exit, desperately trying to get Beca on the same level as her, if she isn't already. And then the two are in this little of bubble of pleasure that neither have experience. A bubble made up of heavy pants, sweaty foreheads mushed together and the steady movement of their bodies against one another. And it should be awkward and weird but it's just not, it feels like the most natural thing in the universe.

Chloe feels herself reach a point and the few seconds of build-up have her eyes squeezed and mouth open before tipping over the edge. She almost has another when Beca comes a moment after, her face taking a similar form to Chloe's own. And the redhead loves it.

They lay there for a moment in the after-math, Chloe's forehead now having sank to Beca's chin and the brunette takes the opportunity to place a light kiss on the girl's hairline and Chloe just smiles and lets out a content sigh.

The redhead hops up after a minute, grabbing the blanket from the end of the bed to wrap around herself. The blanket that Beca puts there for her-she had started doing that when Chloe would stay on a regular basis and she did always get cold so Beca just saved the harm of leaving the bed in search of one. This is why Chloe loves her.

When she walks out of Beca's closet with two old, over-sized tops, Beca's confusion seizes just a little. Chloe watches it drop of her face as she throws a top at her, removing the blanket and popping her head through her own. She jumps on the bed then, landing on her knees and taking Beca's invitation to cuddle into her side at her lifted arm. Her head finds a comfortable place just beside Beca's shoulder while her arm lays on Beca's stomach, and one leg coming up and between Beca's so they're feet wrap around one another. And she'd be lying if she said they hadn't done this before. Because they had. Just not like this. Not this intimate. But Chloe decides it's a nice change. An encouraged one.

Beca's bringing the duvet around them before Chloe can even think how Beca managed to get under it in the first place. It ends up right at Chloe's shoulder and she knows Beca only did that because she knows that Chloe will get cold half way through the night and will 100% shiver to the point of Beca waking up and actually being concerned that Chloe's about to die. It had happened before-more than once. But Chloe had always done that so she just assured Beca she was fine and that it was normal.

Beca's hand comes up to the one led on her ribs and intertwines them, giving Chloe's a gentle squeeze as her other hand traces patterns on the redheads back absentmindedly.

"Becs?" Chloe tilts her head to look towards Beca more, not like she can actually see her but whatever.

"Yes, Chlo?"

"I liked that," Chloe says simply, like she's just stating the weather. A moment of silence follows before Beca whispers, "Me too, Chlo."

"And Becs?"

"Yes, Chlo?"

"I love you," Chloe whispers, almost unsure if she should be saying that. But not a moment of silence follows as Beca whispers, "I love you too."


	3. Don't go, Never leave

Chloe had always been a caring person, at least for as long as Beca knew her anyway and she was more than confident that Chloe had been like that her entire life. But, she just doesn't understand how her girlfriend can do it. She just knew what to do for each person at any given time. It was like a superpower, a superpower that baffled Beca in the most confusing way possible.

When Stacie had come down with the flu, and it was gross, it really was, she wouldn't let anyone in the room but somehow Chloe managed to worm her way in, insisting that she needed to take care of her. No one even knew she was in there until Beca had been exiting her own room when Chloe slipped inside. And after four days of being completely alone, the day Chloe went in was the day Stacie came out, stating she felt a lot better.

When Jess's mother had died, Chloe was the one holding her. Ashley had been visiting her own parents at the time-it was spring break-and Beca distinctively remembers only about 5 of them actually staying in the house those 2 weeks. And Jess had cried, God she cried so hard that Beca had to leave the room otherwise she herself would cry. But Chloe, Chloe had held her on that sofa, whispering sweet nothing's into her ear for God knows how long. And when the blonde had fell asleep, probably from exhaustion, Chloe carried-yes, carried-her up to bed and when Beca saw her taking the stairs like it was nothing-she won't lie-she was very attracted to her. But, what shocked Beca the most is when she had come to collect the redhead to take her to her own room, Chloe had turned towards Ashley's bed, whispering she would stay the night just in case. So, Beca had stayed too, tucked behind Chloe, against the wall so Chloe could easily get up. They had ended up sleeping in that bed for another 2 nights-just in case.

And then there was the little things. Like when Cee would get a bit _too_ agitated and go off on one but Chloe, being Chloe, was always the one calming her down. Heck, she was the only one who knew how. Sometimes it was taking the girl to have a quiet chat somewhere in a soft voice or others it was sternly telling her to go for a walk or take a time out for an hour or two. And she just knew which approach to take. Or when Emily had first moved into the house, even before then now that Beca thinks about it, and the brunette would get so anxious and panicky that she was an inch away from giving herself a panic attack, Chloe would be there. Taking Em up to either one of their rooms-more often than not it was the captains-lying down with her and just slowly running her fingers up and down the girls back. Beca had walked in on it before, she'd been in the room when they came in before too, Chloe shooting her a look to just go with it and not ask questions-she would explain later. And now it was a normal thing.

But Chloe has those little things for all the Bellas, so Beca doesn't know why she's always so surprised when Chloe knows exactly what to do for her. And she can't believe this is what she's thinking about, led in her bed with the duvet brought all the way to her chin, being as close to the wall as she could get. But then her mind wonders, and Beca's not really sure if she even allowed it to. But it is. And all her attention is on this one crack on her wall and she's that close to it that she could probably wiggle her finger and just, just about touch it. She doesn't even know why she's so attracted to it, interested in it. But she is. So, she just let's her eyes go up and down this crack, memorising every bump and edge there is. Because, she _can't_ bring herself to get out of bed, she just simply can't do it. Beca can't even remember the last time she had a day like this because sure she had had bad days whilst living here-in the Bellas house-but never this bad. Not to point where she couldn't get up. All she can seem to do is take shaky breaths and stare at this freakin crack. She knows that she's been there for a while, hours, and she knows she's missed her only class for the day, but she can't bring herself to worry about that right now.

Beca's not even sure how this happened, because she had got up, went to the bathroom and brushed her teeth but then she sat back down and just fell. Not just physically, because yes, she fell back into the mattress, catching her head on the wall as she went, but emotionally too. And she knows that Chloe will worry about the spot of blood on the wall from her head, which is probably all over her pillow by now. But it's not bleeding that bad, Beca knows that-she would have gotten up if it had been but she's pretty sure it's stopped now so she's not worried about it. Realistically though, she knows that Chloe's going to be more worried about Beca's emotional state because yes, Beca had told her about these days, but Chloe's never actually seen it. And Beca's almost tempted to lock the door so she can't. But she doesn't.

And that's when she hears it, just about. The other Bella's coming home, the loud voices echoing through the house and the front door slamming so hard that it makes her body flinch. It hits her like a ton of bricks then-it's Friday. All of them finish classes within 10 minutes of each other so naturally, they all collect as a group and walk home together. So Beca knows her absence _will_ be noticed, more so than any other day of the week. But that also reminds her of just how long she's been led there-it's probably nearing 5 now.

Her senses kick in then, the stampede of feet on the stairs making itself known. She couldn't be more thankful that her and Chloe have the attic room-no one usually comes up unless they want something. But Beca knows the chances of them coming up-its high-so decides to close her eyes, trapping out her wall, and hoping, praying, that everything else goes with it. Including the opening of the door at the bottom of the stairs.

And she tenses, visibly tenses. Her breaths are still shaky but there's not a lot she can do about that.

"Becs?" Chloe's calling out before she even reaches the top of the stairs-Beca knows from the sound of her voice. She hears the creak of the landing step and then something's dropped. But then Beca hears the creak of the step again.

"Em, can you go get the first aid kit for me? Ask someone else if you can't find it," she hears Chloe say on her way over. The voice is getting louder, so she knows Chloe's close.

But then the bed's dipping down and she feels Chloe sit near the bottom of her back, facing her-she can feel it-and place her hand on Beca's arm, the duvet in-between their skin.

"Beca, can you open your eyes?" Chloe whispers, moving her hand up and down Beca's arm. Beca doesn't even know how to respond, because she can but she can't at the same time, but it's not like she can tell Chloe that. She doesn't even think to question how Chloe can tell she's awake because of course she can. Her body decides for her, letting out an exceptional shaky breath which shakes her entire body. "Alright Becs, you're okay, I got you," she continues, keeping her voice quiet. And that's when Beca knows. Knows that Chloe understands what's happening. "I'm just going to move the duvet down, okay?" Beca tries to nod, she thinks she does. It's small and hardly there but she's pretty sure she manages it. The duvet moves, uncovering her hands that had somehow intertwined in this whole ordeal, but Chloe makes sure to keep it as high as she can. Beca knows, in her hazy thoughts, somehow, that Chloe just wants to get to her hands. The thoughts confirmed when Chloe's own left-hand slips in-between hers and knots one hands fingers together. Beca can feel the coldness of the ring on Chloe's middle finger, one that she had bought her, and it makes her wonder how something so cold can be associated with Chloe. It's like polar bears in the arctic, Beca loves polar bears, they might just be her favourite animal, but they live in such a cold environment that she almost feels sorry for them. But then again, she wants that coldness, to ground her and keep things interesting. Even things out.

Her other hand shifts to the back of Chloe's and her finger's find the metal, playing with it and pushing and turning it in any direction she can on Chloe's finger.

And she can't stop. She feel's Chloe's hand still running up and down somewhere and she hears the door open again and the muffle of voices which she knows isn't Chloe but most, if not all, of her attention is on this ring on Chloe's hand.

The bed dips again and Beca can tell there's someone else in the room but she's not sure who and how many are actually witnessing this right now. Which kind of scares her. Because she definitely doesn't want all of the Bella's to see her like _this_. If any. But she knows that won't happen.

"Jess is going to look at your head a minute, Becs," Chloe explains, and Beca can only imagine the silent conversation they had when the blonde came in. "It might sting," she adds on. To be honest, Beca should have guessed it would be Jess. There was only 3 Bella's who actually had a first aid certificate-they're all on this bed-and there was no way Chloe could see to her head when Beca was like this. If they were the only ones home then yeah, she would have to, but Beca needed someone to hold onto right now and that was Chloe's first priority now. And Beca's thankful for that.

Jessica's fingers make themselves known on her head, she can feel them pealing her hair away lightly, obviously trying to actually see the wound. But Beca's not really paying attention to that. She's still fiddling with the ring, distracting herself from what's really happening around her. She's pretty sure no one else is in the room, but she knows, can just tell, that they all know about _this_. Things travel like wildfire in this house. Beca can remember when she had finally got the internship and, she hadn't even told anyone yet, walking into the house, she was immediately bombarded by Chloe and then the rest of them until they were in this massive group hug usually saved for special occasions.

The thing is, she knows she's safe around the Bellas, no matter how much banter (bullying) is thrown back and forth, usually at her, she knows she's safe and Beca's pretty sure everyone feels that way. At least, that's what her and Chloe have tried to provide between them, somehow, and she's almost completely sure that they've pulled it off.

So, she shouldn't be surprised when her eyes open on their own, without her allowance but somehow, she encourages it. And she feels dizzy and tired, keeping her eyes open, but she knows that it'll comfort Chloe and she figures she should give her something right about now.

"Hey, you," Chloe whispers, squeezing Beca's hand and running her hand up and down her upper back from where the duvet had to be pulled down.

"Hi, Chlo," Beca croaks, or at least she's pretty sure she does. It could all be in her head for all she knows. But Chloe squeezes her hand so she's relatively sure she's been heard.

Chloe starts talking about the time they had went ice skating for the first time-and naturally Beca sucked. But Chloe loved to skate and when Beca finally revealed that she had never even stepped on ice, her girlfriend has insisted they went. She had basically dragged her there.

But right now, after the fact she acknowledges the story, she lets her eyes drift to Chloe, whose speaking about it so animatedly that Beca can almost imagine it. But she doesn't let herself, she just wants to stare at the redhead for a while, taking in her beauty. Because, yes, Chloe was beautiful-anyone can see that-but Beca got to see it on a whole new level. The kind of beauty that comes around once in a blue moon when it came to people. The kind that cares so, so much about everyone else that they're just so…selfless and Beca wonders how something as innocent and beautiful as Chloe can even be put on the earth.

Chloe's eyes catch hers as she finishes her story, comforting smile on her lips, and Beca takes a moment to really, truly look at Chloe's eyes. They're just so…blue. But she's never seen a kind of blue like that before and it amazes her how comforting a colour can be. Because right now, she's fairly certain that those eyes, blue eyes, are the only thing keeping her here, grounded.

She can vaguely feel Jessica's hands on her head, one going off every now and then and Beca can tell that it's not a small cut-Jess would be done and gone by now if it was.

And she almost expects Jessica's hand to stray off somewhere and return-it's been happening in a rhythm that Beca didn't even know she was keeping track off-but what she didn't expect was the sting that came with it.

Her face scrunches and her hand squeezes Chloe's and she can briefly feel Chloe's hand rub her back with a little bit more force now. It might, just might, be the reason she whispers "Chlo," a bit louder than last time.

"It's alright, sweetie, it's almost done now," Chloe leans towards her as she says it, kind of awkwardly leaning on Beca's hip and waist. Because Beca still hasn't moved. But, she also can't remember or even recall a time when Chloe called her 'sweetie' because sure, she had heard her say it on numerous occasions to a handful of the Bellas, but never to her. And it kind of hits her then how serious this whole thing is. Because, she can't recall something like _this_ ever happening in the house before. She would know if it had, all the details behind it too-being captain made her privy to those kinds of things.

The sharp sting feeling's been replaced by a numb version of itself now and Jess's hands retreat for a bit longer this time.

"Chloe, we should really wrap this around to…umm protect it for the night," Jessica's whisper echoes in the corner they're all in. Beca takes note of Jess's voice-how unsure she sounds-Beca doesn't think she's ever heard it like that before.

Before she knows what's happening, her hand disconnects from Chloe's to let her elbow lift her up and her body twists, so she can fully sit up. Chloe holds her hands out for Beca to take, helping her up the rest of the way as Beca's legs become crossed and the redhead's right in front of her. She knows her movements are slow, probably too slow, but Beca's just glad that she's actually moving.

By the time she looks into the redhead's eyes again, she's dizzy and lightheaded, while the rooms lightly spinning. Her head droops down to face her lap and she tries to take deep breaths, in and out, like she's had to tell the other Bellas countless times before. She can feel Chloe's hands on her forearms now, rubbing soft circles with her thumb and Beca knows that she must be shitting herself right now because although Chloe doesn't show it most of the time-she worries a lot.

Beca plans on lifting her head, giving both Chloe and Jess some relief, but Chloe beats her to it. Her peach painted fingers, number 027 if she remembers correctly, coming up to Beca's cheeks, and slowly tilting her head to look at the redhead. She sways slightly but then Jess is wrapping something around her head and there's a slight pressure where the sting was once, but her attention stays on the blue eyes in front of her and the thumbs gently stroking her cheekbones, back and forth.

All Beca can think is how she hates this. Actually, _hates_ it. It's like she's lost all control and she's not even sure why or how it happened, how she got here. It's like she just had a complete shift since last night. Because last night she had been fine-Amy sliding down the stairs on that freakin sledge, stating she was 'teaching Legacy how to do this shit properly'. And then her and Chloe had gone to bed, admittedly earlier than usual, but they just led there-in this bed-and talked while lying in one another's arms. Because that's what they did. That's what they both liked to do when the time came to calm down for the night. All the Bella's have their things and it's gotten to the point where everyone knows everybody's before bed things.

Ashley and Jessica would sit on the couch having a chat about their day, the lights low and usually cuddled against one another in some way, and sometimes the odd person or two would join them. Stacie, if she was even home, always made a hot chocolate, took it to her room and sat in bed reading for an hour or two. Everyone was a bit shocked when they had learned that one. Even more so when they all found out that Stacie wore glasses. Emily either wondered around the house, looking for something to do, or she'd come up to their room for an hour to just chat. And Chloe and Beca were fine with that; as captains it was kind of their duty to look after the youngest. Flo would sit on the back porch or grass, a cup of tea in hand, and just took an hour to herself. And anyone else would think it's weird how Beca can automatically just know what the other's do, but they live together, so she just sees it as a normal thing now.

She's still questioning what triggered _this_ when she hears the first aid box close with a click and then some shifting on the bed. One of Chloe's hands are still on her face, the other now placed on her upper arm.

"Thank you, Jess, do you think you could tell Stace to order our usual please?" Chloe asks as Jessica stands, box in hand. It's Friday-movie night-which automatically means Chinese takeout, that Chloe or Stacie usually end up ordering because they're the only ones who can remember everything. So, obviously today it would be the latter. Beca guesses Jessica nods as Chloe mutters a brief, "thank you," before turning back to Beca.

"Thanks Jess," Beca manages to mumble as the creak of the floor board sounds again. She hears a quiet, "no problem" before the click of the door sounds.

And then it's just her and Chloe.

They just look at each other for a moment, trying to silently access the situation and what's happening next between them. Chloe leans forward slightly, pressing her lips to the brunette's forehead before moving back an inch, still staying close.

"Are you okay to move?" Is the decided approach they're taking. Beca only offers a slight nod-she's pretty sure, with Chloe there, she could manage it.

So, Chloe moves slowly away from her, standing at the side of the bed and waiting for, Beca can only guess, her to move and join the redhead.

On shaky hands, Beca leans back and extends her legs, shuffling to the edge of the bed, gripping the mattress each side of her when she gets there. Beca doesn't even know why. But she's not sure how this whole standing thing will go, and she knows Chloe's there, but it still scares her, somehow.

She takes a deep breath and goes for it, rising to find Chloe waiting for her and an arm wrapping around her waist almost immediately. Like Chloe knew she was apprehensive about this.

The arm around her loosens slightly after the first few steps, obviously seeing she was fine by herself, but it always lingers, never strays. Beca's sure Chloe's trying to guide her to the opposite bed but all she wants is to go splash some cold water on her face and just hope that it pushes her a bit more towards reality. Because Beca's hella missing it. "Can we go to the bathroom, please?" Beca asks, tilting her head towards the redhead on her right. Her right hand is on Beca's forearm, the other hovering around her back.

"Yeah, of course," of course, Chloe replies with a smile on her face, Beca doesn't know why she even questions it anymore.

The creak of the floor board sounds _again_ and Beca can't think of a time, other than now, that she actually appreciated the noise. Usually-and by that she means every day-she'd complain that it needed to be fixed and it's ruining her life. And that's putting it lightly. She had even had a full-on tantrum about it once and sure, she had been pissed anyway, probably with Amy, but that didn't make it any less significant. The worst part was that she hadn't calmed down until Chloe had full on tackled her onto the bed, straddling her while pinning her wrists down, and threatening to either tickle her to death or send her to a therapist for her weird outbursts. Beca still doesn't know which one would be worse.

But, right now, it's reminding her where she is. That she's in the Bella house and she's safe. And maybe that's the reason that she actually finds the strength to walk down the stairs, admittedly with Chloe's help-and the wooden poles-and make it to the bathroom. Because, Beca's fairly certain that if nobody(Chloe) came home, she would still be in that corner, not having moved an inch.

"I'll be up in a bit?" Beca whispers just as they make it to the door, Chloe's arm securely around her waist now. But it's not there for protection or help-Beca knows that-it's there for comfort and for Chloe to remind Beca that she's there and she's not going anywhere.

The arm retracts as the brunette's hands push the door open and she hears a quiet, "Okay," before turning, kissing Chloe once on the lips, giving her a small smile, and closing the door.

Her first order of business is to pee, because God she had been bursting for about an hour now and she was fairly confident that pee would come out any second. So, she sits and for some unknown reason, her thoughts go to Jesse. She feels kind of bad because she hadn't given him one thought for what must've been months, but then she reminds herself why they hadn't _talked_ for months, maybe a year now. It's not even like things had ended badly, it was mutual, and they had both agreed to stay friends-more than agreed-they had wanted to stay friends. At least, that's what she thought. But, then Jesse started rejecting her calls, not answering her texts, even blocked her number after a while. And it hurt, hurt like a bitch, because she had loved Jesse, probably still does. And just because she's in love with Chloe, it doesn't make the fact that she loves Jesse any less significant. There was nothing she could do but accept it, Jesse obviously found it too hard to be friends so sure she respected that, what she didn't respect is the fact he completely shut her out without a word. Chloe had tried to reassure that he was probably hurting and that if he didn't realise what he was missing and come back, he wasn't worth a second. And Beca had nodded and agreed. But then he didn't come back, and she should have been prepared by then but God it hit her hard, like the time Amy had started a pile on and Beca was suddenly on the bottom of it all. But he still wasn't here, and she hadn't given him a second. Until now.

The thought quickly evaporates as the sound of maybe a game of…tag, Beca's fairly certain it's tag, can be heard from downstairs and she finds herself smiling because of course they would be playing tag in the middle of a house on a Friday night.

She quickly washes her face and finds her way back to the room, which had been fine until the steps were involved because she can do them, Beca knows, she just really doesn't want to right now. "Chlo, we need a stair lift," she mumbles as she reaches the top.

"Even though I 100% agree with you, I don't think that's in the budget, Becs," Chloe bounces back, her back towards her as she throws the pillow down from changing the sheets. Beca shuffles towards Chloe's bed, sitting down, and lazily smiles because, yes, that is definitely 100% true. She can see that Chloe's changed into some sweats and an old band tee now, which Beca's sure used to be hers. She's pretty much given up on separating her and Chloe's lazy, lay around, clothes now; they both just grab what looks comfy at the time. "How you feeling?" Chloe continues, coming to sit next to Beca, her hand resting on her thigh.

Beca just takes a deep breath because God how does she explain this to Chloe? She's never been good with words. "I…umm…I don't know. Kinda shaky?" Chloe nods in understanding, moving her thumb in circles across the fabric of Beca's sweats. "Like I can't relax-well no not relax…umm…I don't know how to explain it," whispers are blurted out, which actually makes Chloe smirk a little.

"I think I get what you mean, don't worry babe," Chloe interjects, pulling Beca's head onto her shoulder. "Do you feel up to going down? If not, we can stay here, but I really think you should eat something." Her hand has moved to Beca's back now, rubbing circles across it and Beca feels stupid for actually admitting that it's comforting.

"I think so, we're only watching a movie, right? Because I don't think I can deal with anything too crazy tonight," Chloe's nodding throughout and Beca physically can't love Chloe any more than she does in that moment.

"Don't worry, any crazy business I'll take responsibility of shutting down for you," Chloe's smirking and Beca just thinks it's simply beautiful.

"I need a hoodie before we go, I can't go down like this. Fat Amy is down there, Chloe, I don't want to die thanks," she's actually proud of herself for making it sound serious but thinking about it, Beca's not sure if she's acting. Because, sure no one would dare to say anything tonight, but Beca can guarantee she'll hear a million and one jokes about this stupid bandage around her head.

"Okay, hold on," Chloe walks away laughing. She knows it's true; somehow all of the jokes and 'banter' gets aimed at Beca.

Chloe soon walks back in with her own grey hoodie, which she was wearing last night-Beca's pretty sure that's why she picked that one. It's comforting to wear something Chloe has recently wore and Beca hadn't actually said that out loud but apparently Chloe knows, somehow.

Beca removes her own short sleeved top, throwing it across the room somewhere, and replacing it with Chloe's hoodie, leaving the hood over her head in an attempt to hide the bandage. Of course, a lot of it still showed, even with the drowning hoodie, but she lets Chloe loop their arms and lead her to the stairs regardless.

By the time they've reached the bottom, Chloe's wrapped herself around Beca's arm, holding her hand, and Beca just can't get the idea of Chloe being perfect out of her head. Because she 100% was.

"Food's here!" A chorus sounds from downstairs as someone runs towards the door, and Beca can't stop the eyeroll-it happened every week, like a routine.

Emily comes into view as they round the corner of the stairs, handing over the money and taking the bag from the delivery guy. She feels Chloe squeeze her hand as the brunette closes the door and faces them, half way down the stairs and smiles as they reach the bottom before making her way to the kitchen.

Chloe goes to follow, still wrapped around Beca's arm, but Beca stays put, pulling Chloe back to a standstill. "You'll be alright, I promise," Chloe whispers against the side of Beca's head where she's leaned in.

"She wouldn't even look at me Chlo," Beca whispers, slightly disappointed. She doesn't know why, but she expected things to be normal-for them not to treat her differently. But what happened, _is_ happening, is disorientating for everyone, including her and Chloe. Which is why she feels as though she needs to give this whole movie night situation to Chloe, to just pretend like this isn't happening for an hour or two-three if she's lucky. And Beca honestly can't remember a time when she had wanted movie night this badly, to just cuddle up to Chloe, surrounded by the Bellas, carelessly watching some crap that Beca herself couldn't care less about. But that apparently won't happen.

"Becs, they just don't want to upset you, that's all. Come on, I won't leave you, I promise," Chloe squeezes her hand as she says it, lightly dragging her through the door. Beca can't help but think how sad it is that her _girlfriend_ has to say that to her, just to get her into the room. But Beca finds it strange how she wants to be in there, she really does, but there's just that little something in the back of her mind that's making her second guess herself. And fucking hell she just wants it to just piss off.

But Chloe's still there, holding her hand and wrapped around her arm and that's giving her what she needs right now. They make their way through the vacant living room to the kitchen where all the Bellas are trying to find their food in the pile of takeaway boxes.

"Okay, this isn't working!" Stacie shouts from the emptier side of the table, seeming to take charge of the situation. Beca and Chloe just stand at the doorway, admiring how the usually playful brunette can take charge when the captains weren't around to do so. It was a kind of refreshing that neither could explain. "Okay, everyone form a line behind Jessica!" And then everyone's in a line and Stacie's handing out their food, never getting a persons order wrong. No one's noticed either of them at the doorway yet, taking the other door to the living area, but then the lines gone and Stacie's left looking at them.

"And there's the owners of number 24 and 13," Stacie smiles, piling the boxes up on one hand and handing them to Beca. Because, yes, Chloe's still wrapped around Beca like a koala.

"Thanks, Stace," Beca says, following the brunette into the room.

They've lived in this house so long that there's an actual seating arrangement now. It's not an official thing but everyone subconsciously just sits in their space-like a seating plan. When Aubrey had come to visit she had been so shocked, it almost confused her. Beca can remember how it amused Chloe to the point of laughter how she had no idea where to sit. Stacie had ended up pulling her to sit on her lap-but even that was after about 5 minutes of watching the blonde stand awkwardly.

So, Beca automatically guides them to the end of the corner couch, the end with the chaise lounge on-they were the captains after all. They were both surprised when the Bellas actually let them claim that seat as theirs, it was the best after all. And sure, it was a tad bigger than a one-person seat, but if anyone else, bar Ashley and Jessica, had claimed the seat, only one of them would fit. No one else really cuddled to the point of sitting on top of one another so Beca just tells herself that it's to save space.

Everyone's already in place when Chloe's pulling Beca onto the couch. Beca's legs end up bent diagonally over Chloe's, her back against the arm of the chair while Chloe's against the back cushion. Emily passes two forks to Chloe from beside them, like she always does now, and then Beca has one in hand as Chloe takes a box from her. It almost seems rehearsed.

But it's not.

Conversation flows easily through the room, like it always did, and Beca can clearly see that it's a lot calmer than it usually is-something she thinks is purposeful. Maybe Jessica or Emily told them what happened, what they had saw, and they had agreed as a group to keep it down for the night. And Beca feels this weird sense of pride in that moment, because she wasn't too sure if she could pull this whole captain thing off but here they all were, being the amazing people that Beca had tried to encourage. She knows though, that if it did get too rowdy, too nuts, Chloe would put her captain voice to good use and wouldn't bat an eyelash about it. Because that's what Chloe did.

The two stay silent-admittedly kinda in their only little world-as they start eating. Chloe's right hand's come up in-between Beca's knees and stroking her lower knee. Every now and then the other brings a fork full of food to the others mouth, and of course no one questions it-it was what they did. Beca can remember when they first started this whole Chinese thing, the first Friday when they had all eventually moved in, and after that it had just become a thing. Chinese night was Friday. And after a while, after the whole seating situation had been introduced, Chloe had asked to try Beca's order and then silently returned the favour. Now, all Beca had to do was nudge her and open her mouth and Chloe delivered the food. It had just always happened like that.

Beca can feel eyes on her every now and then-to be fair, she doesn't exactly look like her usual self. Her stomach had prevented her from eating anymore a while ago, her Chinese box abandoned against her bent legs, and her body leaning into Chloe, her head on her shoulder. Every now and then, Beca lets her eyes droop closed and Chloe place's a kiss on her forehead in between eating and call Beca cheesy or whatever, but she honestly doesn't want to be anywhere else. Okay, maybe that's a lie. Because Beca can think of a few other things she wants to do with Chloe right now, but she was content. Happy.

"You okay?" Chloe whispers against her head, red hair curtaining them off from any wondering eyes as Chloe's head bends to rest lips against the Brunettes head. She can tell Chloe's concerned and she probably should be but other than feeling slightly shaky and sick, Beca's okay.

"Yeah." Beca raises her head slightly, up off of her girlfriend's shoulder, to look at Chloe properly. "I'm okay," Beca matches Chloe's volume, keeping their heads close together to make up for the loss of volume.

And Beca can 100% tell that Chloe nowhere near believes her, at least not completely. But she doesn't say anything in that moment, something Beca's thankful for. They just simply look at each other, the side of their head's resting against the back cushion of the couch and the room noticeably pauses around them. All conversation stops. But it seems as soon as it stops, it quietly starts again, Amy making her way to the stairs to retrieve blankets 'so you skinny bitches don't freeze to death' or something similar, Beca doesn't really care.

Conversation flows up again, enough that no one would hear their whispers to one another if they dared to speak. Chloe's diverted her eyes to their hands, which had somehow found their way together, laying in Chloe's lap between her and Beca's bent legs. Beca spends a minute just looking at Chloe, her ginger hair flowing over one shoulder from where she had pulled it away to the other side of Beca, and her lips doing that weird twitching thing when she's not really paying attention to anything or deep in thought. Or both.

Beca leans forward slowly, placing her lips on her girlfriend's cheek, kissing lightly, and moving back just enough to whisper, "I love you." It all happened in slow motion, like every move was calculated beforehand. It wasn't. It's just that Beca was still a tiny bit drowsy and she really didn't want to think about fast movements right now. Like at all. But Chloe gets that.

Blue eyes turn to join Beca's, and Chloe leans forward ever so slightly to place a soft kiss on Beca's lips. "I love you too." Again, it's all a bit slower than usual. But then again, everything in their relationship happened slowly, it was how it went from the start. Whenever they were in bed at night, it would be slow, especially kisses, which were usually sleepily placed on shoulders and foreheads. Even their make outs were usually slow. Don't get Beca wrong, they had their desperate hook up as much as any other couple, that was to be expected, but usually it was slow paced and meaningful. Even doing new things happened slowly and when both were ready. They didn't rush. Like when they had slept together for the first time, both were unsure and nervous, so they had waited, and it ended up being 6 months into their relationship when they had eventually done the deed. They didn't rush for anything, they were patient with one another and understanding. The same applied to this situation.

That in contrast to the fast pace of living with the Bella's didn't always have the best outcome. Like right now.

Threes a loud bang…and another…and another…and another, until Amy's voice can be heard, "crushed it!" It sounds guilty and you can just tell that she rolled down the stairs on the blankets. Beca didn't need to look to know. But apparently everyone else did, bombarding out into hallway to check on Amy, laughing and screaming. Everyone but Chloe. Because Chloe had felt Beca visibly jump at the first sound of a rolling Amy and pulled her closer, kissed her forehead as everyone scrambled out to the hallway and now rubbed her knee with her thumb as the volume decreases and they're all heading to the kitchen for something. "You know, its supposed to be _really_ cold tonight." Beca can't help but smirk at Chloe's suggestive tone. "I'm not quite sure what you're referring to Beale," Beca's just as playful in her reply. "It means," Chloe draws out the s, "that we can cuddle, silly." Beca just gives her a knowing smile, because, yes, they already did cuddle pretty much every night, before shuffling down to rest her cheek on the redhead's shoulder. Chloe starts to play with Beca's fingers in her lap while they wait on what is bound to be the movie choosing process in the kitchen.

They're both spread out, legs stretched out and intertwined, when the other girls return stating that they would be watching The Last Song, not that Beca's ever watched it. But apparently Chloe has, as she lets out an "awh, cute" before a blanket's thrown at them and she's spreading it over herself and Beca, making sure it covered as much as her girlfriend as possible. "Comfy?" she asks Beca once they're settled, Fat Amy trying to actually start the movie as it sits on the home screen. Beca only gently nods her head against Chloe's shoulder as she slips her fingers under the redhead's top and rests her finger across her hip. Chloe kisses her forehead at the action, rubbing her back lightly. She knew Beca wasn't feeling well; she wouldn't usually be this cuddly unless they were alone. But all that went out the window when she was feeling in any way negative. And all the Bella's knew it too.

As the movie started, the light chatter in the room automatically silences and someone, Chloe doesn't catch who, flicks the lights off.

They're half way through the movie when Beca shifts for the first time, only slightly, readjusting her leg on top of Chloe's. Chloe had Beca's hand, that had previously gravitated to her hip, in her lap with her own hand, fiddling with Beca's fingers and running her thumb in soothing circles. She didn't even realise she was doing it until Beca had moved. "Okay?" Chloe whispers to her. Just to check. Beca just tucks her head into Chloe so no one could see it. She was avoiding the question and Chloe honestly had no idea what to do. She had only ever heard of Beca like this, from Beca herself, never seen it. And it petrified her. She kept her eyes on the younger girl, running her hand slowly up and down her back, until Beca's head swerved to face the tv again, a little more sunken into Chloe this time.

From then on, Chloe's attention didn't leave Beca, glancing down at her every 5 minutes or so in between watching the movie. She didn't let go of Beca's hand, nor did she stop the patterns on her back. She knew if she did, Beca would just feel that fraction worse. Beca didn't usually show her pain-any type of pain-so when he did, she must be feeling pretty bad. And that killed Chloe a little. Chloe remembers when Beca had fell down the stairs of the house, quite literally rolled and bumped into every wall possible from top to bottom. Everyone obviously rushed to her, hearing it, and asked her if she was okay, some saying not to move her. It was crazy. But before anyone had actually done anything, Beca had got up, stating she was fine, went to the kitchen to grab her orange juice and returned to their room. Everyone watching on, mouths hung wide in amazement. Because Beca had taken a beating, and she's not exactly the biggest of them all either. Chloe ran after her, checking that she was actually okay and found the girl wrapping her ankle of their bed. She didn't cause a fuss, didn't ask for help to get upstairs. Nothing. And Chloe say the bruising that appeared that night. But that was Beca for you.

When the movie was over, it was quite late. Sure, it was early for a Friday night, about 10, but everyone was quite tired and a few of them weren't actually staying in the house tonight. If Chloe remembers right, Amy were going to Bumpers, Stacie was going to pick up Aubrey and bring her back to the house for the weekend, Lily would most likely disappear, and Cynthia Rose was actually going to catch a flight to Maine to visit her girlfriend. So, no, it definitely wasn't a regular Friday night for them.

Everyone kind of drifted off in their own directions after a few minutes, leaving Beca, Chloe, Ashley and Jessica left. The two couples. The other two were in their own little world, whispering and giggling to one another on the other couch, while Chloe just continued doing what she had been doing for the entirety of the movie. She let her eyes drift close and leant her head fully into the cushion behind her. Before she knows it, Chloe hears the door click close and opens her eyes to reveal the room empty. Beca shifts again, picking her head up to look at Chloe. "Wanna go up?" it comes out as a rasp from Chloe's shoulder. Ginger curls shuffle across her shoulders as Chloe shakes her head. "Can we just sit here for a bit longer?" So, Beca lowers herself down to rest on her chest again and they sit, the only movement being that of entangled fingers.


	4. Induce Me

Beca's tired, fucking irritated and God help her, all she wants is this fucking baby out of her. A week. A week past her due date and nothing. Nothing but stupid tiredness and aches. Don't get her wrong, she wants this baby more than anything, she just doesn't want it inside of her anymore. Probably more so than Chloe. Which is saying a lot.

* * *

Beca can feel Chloe's breath on her neck, her nose resting by her shoulder, and her hand resting on her side. In other words, her wife was fast asleep, thankfully. But Beca kind of wished she was awake, so she could talk to her, or feel her hand making soft patterns on her hip or belly. But she wasn't. And Beca wasn't selfish, she wasn't going to wake her up, not after the horrible work day she had supposedly had and Beca's ever growing cravings pissing her off to no end. The brunette just thinks she's jealous of Beca's whole period situation while the redhead's suffering.

So Beca lays there, trying so, unbelievably hard to go to sleep, but her back is killing her and she _needs_ to move. But she isn't selfish. Okay, maybe she is. So, slowly, always so slowly, Beca shuffles away from Chloe and then turns towards her to lay on her back. She lets out an involuntary groan at the movement and tries to stretch, with minimal movement to the mattress so as to not jostle Chloe, but nothing seems to relieve her pain. And then Chloe's moving, probably from the movement, and Beca's not sure whether to prepare herself to be shouted at or comforted. Because, believe it or not, her wife loved her sleep and due to that, whenever woken she could be very unpredictable. So Beca stares at the ceiling in hopes that Chloe will just go straight back to sleep.

"Hey." Fuck. Beca's not sure of a time, other than this of course, when she's ever been unhappy to hear Chloe's groggy voice.

"Hi babe, go back to sleep," Beca turns slightly to face her, putting her hand on the redhead's arm and smoothing her fingers over it.

"What's wrong?" Of course. Beca should've seen that one coming.

"Nothing, I'm fine.

"Beca…remember that little chat we had? Where you said you would tell me everything from now on? Yeah, well umm that kinda applies here, I'm afraid."

So Beca gives in, because yes, they had had that chat. "My back hurts."

"Turn around," Chloe says simply. It's such a quick response, Beca's not sure if it was even thought through but of course, she does. And, God, she's never been so happy than when she feels Chloe's hand's run up her top and rest on her back. Thumbs quickly start massaging each side and Beca can't help but let out a sigh of contentment. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, try relax." Beca feel Chloe's kisses on her back, on her shoulders, and she can tell from her wife's voice that he doesn't want a reply. Not one in the form of words anyway. She wants her to relax, to rest, and try, really fucking try, to go into a restful sleep.

* * *

 _Should I, or shouldn't I?_ That was Beca's thought process. _I shouldn't_. _Nope, sorry Chloe but it's just not happening._ And of course, she would most likely have to apologise to Chloe in approximately 10 minutes, not because she _has_ to, because let's be honest, Chloe wouldn't cause a fuss over it, but because she _wants_ to. Yet Beca still can't be bothered to get up, clean her mess from the table in front of her where the only visible space was the part her feet were on. But she was pregnant and that's all the reason she needed for not getting up.

She hears the door open a few minutes later over the tv, and then the keys clatter in the dish next to the door. The brunette knows that the redhead will probably bounce in here, telling her about some kitten she saw on the way home or how she had the best coffee today or some random, ridiculous thing that happened, so she turns the volume down just a few notches, just so she can have an actual conversation with her wife. Yet Chloe still hasn't come in. And Beca's back is to the door but she's pretty sure Chloe's not in here. She would have heard her come in. "Babe?" Beca decides to shout to the kitchen. She still can't be fucked to get up.

There's a few seconds where Beca's just staring into space, waiting for an answer until, "I'm peeing!" And its just as enthusiastic as Chloe usually is after work, but something sounds off. And Beca's not too sure what. Firstly, Chloe had the bladder of…well, she just had a really good bladder, to the point where Beca was seriously freaked out. Seriously, the girl peed like once a day, if that. So, Beca's kind of suspicious of that fact alone. And then there was Chloe's voice. It was loud-had to be to go through the entire house from the bathroom to the living room-but there was just something that sounded off. Like when Chloe would get really tired, but she just _had_ to stay happy, for whoever was around her. Maybe she was just tired. _Yeah, just tired._

Sticking with that, at least until Chloe made her entrance, Beca decides to lean back into the couch, blanket over her legs, and wait for Chloe.

Of course, by the time Beca actually turns her head at the sound of redhead, all thoughts are gone, and her attention is on the tv. Until she sees Chloe.

"Chlo, what's wrong?" It comes out of Beca's mouth instantly as she lifts her left arm, inviting Chloe to cuddle into her side. Chloe _did_ love her cuddles and if Beca knew right, a cuddle _did_ always help.

But right now, it seemed as though the redhead was in need of more, because to be honest, Beca had only seen Chloe like this on a handful of occasions. And they were rare occasions. Very rare. Chloe just stands a few feet from the couch, where Beca's open arms are, looks Beca right in the eye and lets out a slow breath. Like that's the first relief she's gotten all day. But then she's moving forward to Beca and sitting next to her, cuddling into her side.

Beca, being Beca, was shit scared. She didn't do emotions very well and sure she had definitely improved over the years, but her comfort skills weren't the best. And Chloe obviously has a lot of emotions. So, Beca, _being_ Beca lets Chloe grab on to her, tucking her head under Beca's own head and gently strokes her wife's back. That was all she knew to do, for now.

"I don't know," Chloe's reply comes a few moments later, just heard over the mumbling of the tv. But Beca was grateful for the small background sounds.

"What do you mean? They were both talking in whispers of course, the only difference being that Chloe's were into Beca's shoulder and Beca's were against red hair.

"I mean, I can't relax, I feel anxious. _Have_ felt anxious all day."

"So, its your anxiety?" You know that 'shit yourself' feeling that Beca had? Yeah, well that's back. Because Chloe's anxiety hadn't made an appearance since college. Senior year if Beca remembers right. So, the fact that its reappeared right before they're about to have a baby, that's a little scary.

"I guess," Beca hears after a few seconds. Chloe sounds almost disappointed by the fact, but in a weird way.

"You'll be okay, I got you." Beca kisses her forehead, squeezes her hand, because what else is she supposed to do?

A few hours later, when Chloe had been asleep for hours, still cuddled into Beca and legs across her lap, under the blanket of course, Beca manages to wake her, convincing her that they should head up to bed. So, that's where they go. Beca sits Chloe down on the bed, silently telling her to stay, grabs one of her own over sized hoodies from the closet with some shorts and helps her wife get dressed and then settled into bed. That's before sorting herself out of course, and then helping get Chloe comfortable against her.

She could feel her wife shaking, still, not that Chloe realised, but she had been that way since she'd come home. So, Beca decides to see how she is in the morning, make her take the day off if she had to. Whose kidding? Chloe was _so_ taking the day off tomorrow.

* * *

"Goddamn it, Chloe," Beca finds herself whispering into the fridge. To say she was frustrated would be an understatement. And okay, it was totally uncalled for and Beca knows she's being irrational and a straight up dick but its just hormones you know? Like when you get your period and you're just a bitch to everyone around you even though all you want is a hug.

"What's taking you so long?" Chloe bounces in from the living room, playful tone and all.

"There's no milk," Beca mumbles as she puts the sugar away in the cupboard, just about able to reach.

"Oh yeah, crap, sorry I totally forgot to get some."

Beca only responds with an annoyed hum-she can tell Chloe isn't happy and probably confused but what was Beca to do about that?

"Okay, what's wrong? I'm sorry about the milk but-"

"I know you're sorry but that doesn't change the fact that there's no milk and I just made a cup of tea and you know how goddamn much I hate that, Chlo, and all I want is some tea because tea is great, and I just really want some, and, and, oh my god why am I crying?" Beca finishes her rant with tears flooding down her face-over tea-and yes Beca's kind of ashamed of herself. Nine months of pregnancy and she's managed to avoid anything overly emotional like this-okay there was that one time-and a week before her due date she's fucked up that commitment.

"Okay, I know, I'm sorry. It's okay." Chloe completely forgets the fact that Beca was just being a bitch, something Beca adds to the list of reasons why she loved her, and wraps her arms around the brunette.

"How about we go watch some Netflix in bed?" Chloe whispers over her shoulder from where their wrapped around one another. To be honest Chloe had no clue what was happening, _none,_ she had never been pregnant, never would unfortunately, so how could she understand? She couldn't. All she knew is that this whole pregnancy is messing with Beca's brain and that's not in any way her wife's fault.

So, she pulls back at Beca's nod, places her hand in the small of her back, and gently guides her upstairs where they split off at the doorway. Chloe makes her way over to the tv on the wall, Beca heading for the bed.

By the time Beca's cuddled into Chloe, quietly giving in to the fact that she just really needs some comfort, the redhead has her own thoughts on _why_ Beca was acting the way she was.

"I'm sorry for being a dick," Beca eventually mumbles into Chloe.

"It's okay, Becs. You're pregnant, I'm surprised this hasn't happened yet."

"Well, yeah but over milk! Fucking milk, Chloe, I'm going nuts!"

"You're not, babe, you're just scared and pregnant and your hormones are all out of whack."

"Yeah, maybe," Beca whispers, actually thinking it through like this hasn't gone through her mind before now. And then its silent again, other than the sound of the tv obviously.

* * *

"Well you know my suggestion," Chloe reminds her as she guides Beca to the bed.

"How could I forget?" Sarcasm as always.

"I'm serious, Becs. It's actually proven to induce labour!" It always happened like this, Chloe saying something to try and convince Beca, but she always ignores the redhead. This time, however, she was actually considering.

"Chloe…" Beca sighs. She doesn't have the energy to go through this. Again.

"No, seriously, babe, just hear me out. I can see you're miserable so if this doesn't work, which I'm 99% certain it will, then at least it will relax you a little and-"

"Fine Chlo, let's do it," Beca cuts her off. Oh god, what did she get herself into?

"Really?" Chloe says with a bit too much excitement for Beca's liking.

"It's worth a shot, right?"

Chloe only hums as she walks back over to the bed, sitting beside Beca. They smile at one another, and then Chloe's leaning in like she has so many times before. Beca's hands are instantly all over the redhead. Hormones.

They set a steady rhythm, tongues joined in a war, as hands roam and light moans escape. But then Chloe's moving her lips down her wife's neck and she instantly stops when Beca's hands are on her shoulders.

"I think my water just broke," Beca mumbles out, wide eyed.

"See! Told you it was scientifically proven," is all Chloe says.

"Chlo!" Okay, so Beca's freaking just a little. Only a little.

"Babe, its fine, okay? We're having a baby!"

"Yeah, okay but Chlo!" Just a little.

"Becs calm down, we can't go to the hospital until your contractions are close together…We should probably get you downstairs though." And there's the 'Doctor Beale' Beca had been waiting to see since she felt the gush of liquid.

"Okay, yeah, you're right."

So, Chloe helps Beca to the couch, setting her against the cushions comfortably before perching next to her, letting her hand drift up and down her wife's arm.

"Chlo, I'm scared," Beca mumbles after the first contraction. And Chloe can tell, can _see_ , that Beca is terrified. Probably more so than Chloe's seen before.

"I know, honey, I know. But just remember that's worth it, okay?" The redhead tries to soothe her, tries to calm her down even slightly by running her hand up and down her back or arm and whispering to her. But Beca's in labour. And there's no calming that down.

"Ah, Chlo I'm sorry but I really hate you right now," Beca manages through clenched teeth as another contraction hits. Chloe can't help but smile, she felt like one of those stereotypical husbands that you read about in books or in movies that just get shouted at the entire time. But, much-like those people, she's 100% okay with Beca throwing some nasty words that she doesn't even mean at her for a couple hours if that's what will get her through this. She is giving Chloe a child, that, to be put simply, she couldn't have herself, so if Beca wants to swear and hate Chloe for a tiny fraction of their life's then Chloe says swear away!

Okay, okay, so I'm really really sorry about how short this chapter is but a) I didn't want to write the part where Beca actually gives birth(that just isn't my thing) and b) I kind of lost inspiration for this chapter. But it was requested so here it is! Please leave ANY requests for this series or maybe a tip or the type of fics you like? Okay? Okay. Byeeee


	5. The First Party

"Beca, help," Chloe whines through the house, down from the loft, drawing out the 'a' and 'p'. Just to get Beca's attention.

"What?" The brunette shouts back from the bottom of the stairs, and Chloe can just tell she has a mouth full of food, probably pizza.

"Can you come here, please?" There's no reply but she stays put, waiting on something. She knows Beca wouldn't just ignore her.

Sure enough, Beca comes around the corner of the second flight of stairs, pizza in hand, a minute later, pushing Chloe into their room and up the stairs. "Sorry, I would have come sooner but I had to fight Amy for _MY_ piece of pizza." It's funny, Chloe thinks, that Beca doesn't even seem fazed that Chloe's stood there in just her bra and shorts.

"Okay, well I need your advice," Chloe turns back round to the closet, picking up a tight dress, holding it up to herself and turning back around. "Should I wear this or…" and back around again, this time returning with boyfriend jeans and a blue blouse, holding it up to herself again, "this one?"

Beca just stared at her dumbstruck.

"See something you like, Becs?" Chloe smirks, sending Beca a wink and whipping back around to face her closet again.

"Always Chlo," Beca eventually snaps out of her stare and jokily winks back.

"Beca," drawing out the 'a' once again, "help me, come on, this is a serious issue I have." It almost shocks Beca at how serious the redhead had turned in just a matter of seconds, she looked genuinely concerned.

"Well," Beca starts, joining Chloe in the closet, "it depends if you're hunting tonight or not, as Stacie would put it." Chloe's almost shocked at the words, giving Beca a side eye. "And if I _were_ to do that, which would you suggest?" Beca has always loved Chloe's sarcastic side, because yes. the answer was so blatantly obviously but Chloe, being Chloe, just wants to hear the brunette say it. And Beca knows that.

"Okay, so here's the deal. If you want a one night stand with a jerk but look like a million bucks, then go with this one," and of course, she jumps in next to the dress and shows it off with her hands, "but, if you want to maybe flirt a little, have a dance and a few too many drinks all while looking super-hot, then go for this," and then Chloe's watching the little brunette do the same to the next outfit, amused expression set firmly on her face throughout Beca's little performance. But Chloe wasn't that easy. And Beca knows that.

"Okay, I see your point…but which one is going to make you more attracted to me than you already seem to be, Becs?"

"Hmm, that's a good question, Beale. I think I'd probably have to go with the jeans."

"Then it is that I shall go with," Chloe beams happily, jumping happily towards the outfit on display and mocking Beca's previous 'performance'.

"Ding ding ding, we have a winner!"

A few hours later, Chloe's changed in said outfit, pulling clothes from her and Beca's closet for the brunette who, as always, 'has nothing to wear'. So, as always, Beca sends the redhead to pick her out an outfit, fully trusting Chloe's sense of style and the fact that she knows what Beca likes, which in itself is a rare attribute.

Eventually, all the Bella's are ready, Beca being the last downstairs of course, and head over to the Trebles house.

And of course, Chloe's managed to get her hands on two drinks, handing one to Beca, barely a minute after travelling through the hedge to the Trebles backyard.

This is it. The first party of their final year. So, obviously, drinking's going to be involved.

Chloe's hands are tightly wrapped around Beca's as they dance, the crowd big enough to probably break several campus rules. Originally, Chloe had dragged, after begging, Beca to dance and she wasn't too sure if the brunette would fully get into it but here she was, dancing with Chloe like there's no tomorrow. And sure, Chloe can feel the other Bellas, maybe a few Trebles too, eyes on them because yes, they were maybe pushing the boundaries of friends right now but who cares? Not Chloe or Beca apparently. And no, neither of them were drunk enough to blame the actions on alcohol, at least Chloe wasn't, but Beca wasn't her usually uncontrollable, giggly, drunk self so neither was she. But there they are, dancing with each other as if no one was looking.

But, that was what they did.

And honestly, Chloe can't remember a single party since she's met the little brunette where they haven't done this. It was normal yet unusual and weird at the same time-but what wasn't? Everything they did would be considered weird to an outsider's eye, but the Bellas were used to the flirty friends, so much so that every 'weird' or 'unusual' thing they seemed to do was considered normal. They have lived together for years and everyone subconsciously picks up on everyone's schedules and habits. And that included how Chloe would volunteer to go shopping _every_ Saturday _,_ dragging Beca with her every week without fail, which was saying a lot considering both of them weren't morning people. Like at all. Or how there'd always be one night every week where the both of them would cook, refusing anyone's help, and sure it took twice as long with them messing around, but it was normal now. And it was great.

Somehow, another 20 minutes have passed and they both find themselves in a game of truth or dare, at which Beca rolled her eyes at, in a circle with several Bellas and of course, the Trebles. They're sat next to each other, but Beca's hand had been pulled to Chloe's lap where the redhead's own hand is holding it tightly. And sure, everyone knows that they have a close relationship, more than close really, but somehow, they're just that extra bit closer tonight. Beca tells herself it's the alcohol. She knows it's not.

The two manage to avoid several rounds as the bottle never lands on them, making them a victim, and they both sit and watch everything else unravel. First, it was Aubrey full on making out with Stacie, straddling and all, and then it was Lily streaking up and down the street. So. let's just say they were considering themselves lucky, even though, yes, both could guess the inevitable dare or truth one of them were to get.

And then it landed on Chloe….

"Ooo, I have one!" Aubrey shouts at Jess from across the circle, leaning over to whisper in her ear. Beca knows it's bad by the blonde's smirk.

"Aubrey! I can't-okay okay, fine…I dare you to spend 7 minutes in heaven with Beca." Jess looks almost guiltily at them as she says it. Almost.

Things take a turn then, Chloe rolls her eyes, as if she was expecting it-Beca's not all surprised-but confidently stands, helping Beca up and dragging her into the Trebles games room, declared the 'sex room'-as Amy had put it. And Beca's not at all shocked when Chloe throws a playful smirk and a wink over her shoulder at the rest of them as she closes the door. That's what Chloe does. And its for that reason that Beca only smiles good naturedly and hops up onto the pool table, swinging her legs from where they hang. Chloe's directly in front of her, leaning against the door, eyes tightly closed and looking like she's mentally preparing herself for something-but Beca's not entirely sure what. Chloe's own hand turns to lock the door while opening two blue orbs and staring into Beca's, still at her place by the door.

"So, what you want to do?" Beca finds herself saying, almost nervously-its not like they were going to do anything, right? Anything they were expected to be doing anyway.

"Well," two long strides are taken, "I was thinking that we could talk?" Chloe stand's in front of Beca by the end of the sentence, so close that her knee caps come into contact with the redhead's own thighs.

"You know I'm not amazing at that, but I'm sure I can try," she tries to shoo away the serious aura in the room, even giving Chloe a smirk, but she seemed set on talking to Beca about _this_. And, deep down, Beca knew what _this_ is, what it implies. And yes, she was shit scared-but she was also somehow curious and excited?

"Okay…okay so I'm just going to be honest here, okay?"

"Okay…" Beca replies awkwardly. It somehow reminds Chloe of their first year together, a year filled with awkward shower encounters and police cars and movie nights (much to Beca's dismay) and teasing Aubrey in the apartment and then teasing Stacie _and_ Aubrey in the apartment and Beca. Just…Beca. But all that could go to shit now.

"I would say you're my best friend," Chloe starts after a shaky breath, "but don't tell Aubrey that, I'd never hear the end of it…But, our friendship is a lot different than mine and Aubrey's and I don't know I guess there's a reason for that. I mean, there has to be." Chloe keeps her eyes on her hands resting just above Beca's knees and lets herself stare at the moving fingers on the denim. She can feel Beca looking at her, but she doesn't dare look up. "And every time we're sent off for the inevitable 7 minutes, like right now, I _want_ to kiss you, like every time we've done this since your first year. And honestly, I'm surprised we haven't kissed yet considering how many times we've done this or even just as friends, especially since I've kissed Aubrey before. Or when the Bellas say we're like a married couple, I _like_ to think about that. And that's not normal for best friends. I know there's something here, something that I'm pretty sure you feel too," she pauses, and then slowly lifts her head to meet Beca's eyes. " _Do_ you feel it too?" It comes out as a whisper but Beca feels the weight behind her words.

She feels everything, every feeling, that's been there throughout their years together all at once. And yes, it's _very_ overwhelming. Especially for someone like Beca. She's never been good with words, Chloe knows that, so Beca's not entirely sure what to say. A simple yes should and would satisfy Chloe, would be more than enough. But its not as easy as saying it out loud, is it? She needs to get this right because God…Chloe had been her dream girl since day one and she would never forgive herself if she fucked this up now. This whole romance thing. Beca's pretty sure Chloe would never stop being her friend, they were too attached for that, but after something like this, would they be the same? Beca honestly had no fucking clue.

But life was too short for 'what ifs'.

So, Beca keeps eye contact with the blue in front of her and slowly, ever so slowly, moves forward to Chloe's own face, leaving plenty of time for the redhead to move if this wasn't what she wanted. But then Chloe's moving towards Beca and both of their eyes are closed by the time their lips lightly brush against one another

It's just a brush at first, a simple, slight touch that barely exists but as their lips separate just an inch and crash back together, they let it happen, let emotions take over. It's still slow though, like their relationship, and meaningful of course.

In a mission to get closer, Chloe's belt loops get tugged, pulling her in between Beca's legs and against the pool table where the brunettes hands return to her hips and Chloe's own land on Beca's shoulders and intertwine at her neck. The kisses continue, barely separating every now and then to get a breath in, and honestly? They're both loving it. I mean, who wouldn't? And yes, Chloe's hand may make a pathway up through the brunette locks, probably gripping a little _too_ hard and yes, Beca's hands may have strayed _slightly_ to Chloe's thighs and around to her behind, but that's okay. Because this is what they both wanted and waited so long for. This moment right here.

"Hmm, not that I'm not loving this-because I, am-but you still didn't answer the question…I need to hear you say it Becs," Chloe's voice seems to lose volume from start to finish. They're still close, only an inch in between their faces and Beca's not sure if she's happy at that fact or not because yes, she loved Chloe, but when the redhead was this close Beca found herself unable to concentrate 99% of the time.

"I feel it," Beca mumbles out, lowering her head slightly so her eyes are on where their legs are touching, and her forehead gently hits Chloe's. "I've felt it since freshman year." Beca decides that's good, that's good right? Chloe doesn't reply, doesn't say anything, which slightly panics her but Beca knows she's there, and that's enough for now. She can feel the fingers on her neck, gently playing with the hair there, and then she can feel Chloe's own legs resting against hers, almost as if she was made to fit there. But Beca's always loved how her and Chloe fit together.

"I think the 7 minutes are up, we should probably go back out there so we don't get teased even more than we do already," Chloe chuckles slightly at her own words, and Beca's not sure if she's ever heard anything more beautiful. "But we'll talk later, okay? When we get back to the house? About the date I'm going to take my girlfriend on," Beca's just nodding throughout, until she hears the word 'date' and 'girlfriend' where her head automatically stops, and she stares at Chloe.

But then it goes to her head and she's smirking at Chloe, hopping off the table and pecking Chloe's own lips before going to unlock the door and walk out, hand in hand with her _girlfriend_.

It's an unspoken agreement that _this_ , this whole thing, is being kept between them. For now, anyway. But that wasn't anything new, most things that happened between them had and will stay a secret, all the important things anyway. And this was definitely included. For now.

That was the plan anyway, but having a 'girlfriend', a hot girlfriend at that, dancing with you may be a bit too seductively and basically having permission to love and encourage it was hard to resist. And that was coming from both parties involved. So yes, both of them kinda held back on the alcohol after realising that this would be hard enough already but everyone else was drunk, so they figured so what if a hand wondered every now and then.

It was once everyone started doing body shots in the kitchen when Chloe gently tugged on Beca's arm and motioned her head to the back door. Beca's only response is slight nod and a step towards the redhead, so Chloe gently guides Beca outside to the patio. The only people that seem to be left outside is couples wanting to get out of the crowd and a few _drunk_ people. And both were happy for that.

"Do you wanna go back to the house? I'm kinda done with the party," Chloe squeezes Beca's hand as she says it and Beca's so, so close to questioning the fact that Chloe wants to leave a party before 11 because yeah, that's kinda more of a Beca thing but she only nods along happily.

And then Chloe's wrapping herself around Beca's arm like she always does when she's cold and leads her down, through the hedge and back up to their own back door. And they both _know_ that the other girls won't be returning for at least a couple of hours yet, probably more. Heck, last year a couple of them-Amy, Stacie and Lily- didn't return for another 2 days after the party. So, they definitely have the house to themselves.

Chloe goes in first, the brunette holding the door from the outside for her, only to close it, turn around and be pushed back against it. It's not hard, just enough pressure for Beca to stumble back and for Chloe's body to get as close as it can before latching her lips to the brunettes.

It isn't long before Beca feels Chloe lean back, looking into Beca's eyes. But what surprises Beca the most is that there's no sex filled desires in them, just pure love and intimacy-no sexual desires-and Beca kinda likes that.

"What do you say we go snuggle in bed with some tv and have a chat?" Chloe stays close, close enough so Beca can hear her whisper-they both want to keep the nice relaxed environment. So Beca gives a gentle, "sure" and then her hands being pulled by the redhead, up the two flights of stairs, through the door to the loft, up the final steps and through to the closet in their room. Where it finally let's go and leaves Beca in the middle of racks of clothes and dirty piles covering the corners of the small room.

Chloe's stripping as soon her body leaves Beca's, throwing her blouse over her head and onto the floor then unbuttoning her jeans as she picks up a top-Beca's sure its hers-putting her arms through first and then her head as her legs kick of the loose denim which pools at her feet. The brunette only watches, completely still, while Chloe steps out to reach the shelf with the shorts on-and yes, it's _the_ shorts now ever since Chloe figured out they were the same size.

By the time Chloe turns to face her again, sporting a baggy tee and shorts, Beca's still completely still, just looking at the blue eyes as if they were the most beautiful thing ever. To Beca they were. And they stay looking there as the redhead's own hands gently come up to rest on her hips and under her shirt, ghosting over her ribs, lifting the shirt as she does. "Arms up," gets whispered and Beca slowly raises her arms, letting Chloe pull the shirt over her head and watches as it slips from thing fingers and pools at the floor. The thing is, some people may consider this weird, them undressing each other, but this isn't the first time it's happened. Chloe had in fact changed Beca before, more than once, when the brunette would come home so late from that fucking internship Chloe hated so much and was literally exhausted. Seriously, if the redhead didn't step in, Beca would just sleep in her clothes. But the other women had stopped that immediately. And Beca, well she had only changed Chloe when either the redhead was drunk or was totally out of it from anxiety or illness-unlike Chloe, the brunette only did it when necessary.

But now, this is the first time Chloe had done it and Beca be actually aware of it. And she'd be lying if she said she wasn't enjoying it.

It seemed over far too fast, as the next thing the brunette is aware of is Chloe pulling her against her side, head lightly resting on her shoulder and the low chat of a movie on at the end of the bed. When did that happen?

They don't talk for a while, simply basking in each other's presence. It's Chloe who finally breaks the silence between them.

"Are you okay? -you know, with all this?" She even squeezes Beca a little as if to point out the obvious.

"ye-Chloe, of course I'm okay with this. I'm great with this, are you okay with this?" The brunette tilts her head a little to get a better view of the other women, you know, so they could actually talk but neither of them loosens their hold on the other.

"I'm more than okay right now," she whispers back, giving her signature smirk.

"Good," Beca barely whispers into her shoulder before pecking her on the lips and returning to her previous comfortably position.

Chloe's amazed when Beca actually watches the movie-there wasn't a lot that could usually hold the brunette's attention when they did this-but now it's herself that can't pay attention. Typical. But Chloe was surprisingly okay with it, instead being content to massage the younger women's scalp and trace her fingers over the hand on her stomach.

It had been silent between for what Chloe guessed was the most part of an hour, that's if she was keeping track of the movie right, when Beca spoke again. "Are we going to tell the girls?"

"Personally, I think we should wait - just a little bit - but if you want to tell them then I'm okay with that too," Chloe seems so sure on her answer that Beca wonders just how long Chloe's been thinking this whole scenario through.

But the brunettes also surprised when Chloe doesn't seem to know her answer, she was Beca for gods sake, anyone should know her answer to one of those situations where you tell people things. So, naturally, Beca's turning her head and lifting it from the redhead's shoulder and giving her a look that says _are you fucking kidding me?_ to which Chloe giggles slightly, her eyebrows up and that cheeky smirk Beca knows all too well. "What?" She's still lightly giggling when she says it so Beca's fully aware she knows _what_.

"You know what."

"Well, I had to give you an option, didn't I?!"

"Not when you know the answer!" There both laughing and getting way too into this when Beca playfully rolls her eyes and drops back on to her shoulder. And that's when she takes a moment. Just to remember that Bhloe, in the good nature of Amy, was an actual thing now. And it should feel different, but it doesn't, physically at least, because _this_ was normal, they literally cuddled every night if they were both there. It had been that way from a week after they started sharing the room. Chloe's bed, the smaller of the two, had literally become a storage unit for bags and other crap they throw on there pretty much anytime they reach the room. So, physically, it didn't feel different. But everything other than that did. Just being together feels more intimate, maybe because of the new-found permission of actually being able to kiss and touch each other as more than friends. But both of them encouraged the change.

"Hey, you okay?" Beca has no idea how long has passed since she kinda blanked from the world but obviously long enough for Chloe to grow concerned.

"Yeah, I'm good," and really, she was. Who wouldn't be in this situation?

"I'm glad you're good," it's only after Chloe says it that Beca realises how quiet the room is – the tv's off now and if she kind of squints her eyes to concentrate, the low hum of the party next door can be heard. But neither of them has any interest in that.

"Do you think we should lock the door? So, you know, no one wonders in at 4am like everyone always seems to do," there's that giggle again that Beca loves, and of course it's at her being half asleep already.

"Probably, yeah," Chloe manages to whisper, starting to move to actually go and do said thing.

"I got it," gently pushing Chloe back down, the brunette manages to find her balance and make it to the door without falling down the stairs - a regular occurrence – and make it back up without incident. When she catches sight of the bed again, she's welcomed with the sight of Chloe cuddled up, facing her of course, looking just about ready to drift off. So, she climbs in, reaching over to touch the lamp, plunging the room into darkness and cuddling into her _girlfriend_.


	6. It's Okay

**So hi! I'm aware I haven't updated in a gazillion years and I'm sorry but here ya go! Better late than never right?**

 _Beep beep beep_

It's like a mantra in Chloe's ears, hearing it every now and then when someone had to be up exceptional early for something. And usually-when it wasn't for her at least-she would at least wake up a little and give Beca a kiss and a good morning before settling back down but today that just wasn't happening. Today, she simply nuzzles her face into the brunette's neck from where it was perched on her shoulder and tightens her hold her arm has on Beca's abdomen. She feels the brunette rubbing her back and then she's vaguely aware of her wife leaning away, probably to turn that stupid ass alarm off.

With the incessant beeping gone, the redheads able to relax again, falling asleep slowly but steadily. And she's pretty sure she feels Beca shifting below her-she can't be sure-but she knows _something_ in the room is moving and god she just wants to lay here all day and do nothing but sleep and maybe watch some tv-all in her wife's arms of course, but they can't. Because the fucking alarm starts rambling again, only reminding her that _the wife_ she wants in her bed all day is instead going to be at meetings for pretty much the entire day. Which sucks. For Chloe. For Beca. For their kids-even though they probably wouldn't care that much. For everyone really. It sucks. But she can still feel Beca's presence, and her hand rubbing lazy circles on her back which is enough for now.

Then Beca moves. A move that Chloe had learned meant that she was going to get up-she bent her legs _just_ slightly and gently shook her head from side to side. She always thought it was weird whenever the rare moment occurred that she saw it-she always imagines that Beca's thoughts bounce of the walls of her skull and collide with each other, but a nice collision you know? Like a mashup of music.

"Chlo, I need to get up baby," she hears Beca whisper, just about hearing her. Her lips are on the top of ginger locks, pressing into Chloe which just makes the woman realise that Beca _really_ has to go. She only responds with a light hum, acknowledging but not fully accepting the fact that she had to be on her own for a while. Or for pretty much the whole day. "You okay?" It's the same volume as before, just with a hint of concern this time which makes Chloe pull herself together just a fraction-not a lot but it's something. But another hum floods out of her mouth and then she's questioning whether it was the right decision or not. Because she's not quite sure if she is okay.

And that, that's an odd feeling for her. See Chloe had always had the idea that what's the point in being sad when you have that one happy thing in your life-even if its just one. And Chloe, well, Chloe had 5 of those things-people, to be more precise-living under the same roof as her. So, naturally she had taught all 4 children the same thing, as long as they had each other-their mothers included in that-then they had something happy, some support to fall back on when they needed that extra boost. And, thank the heavens, they had all taken that in stride and her and Beca knew, _know_ , that if any one of them-and each other-were going through something or had any type of problem then they would come and talk to them about it. Or at least tell them something was wrong. But they also knew-as they got older and started to have actual real-life problems that couldn't be fixed with a band aid and a kiss-that there were those days that they don't want to ask for help. And honestly? They had days where some of them didn't want to get out of bed-and they, didn't-but you bet your ass that Chloe and Beca were straight on that problem as soon as it occurred. And yes, yes, they had allowed each and every one of them-the ones that were old enough, anyway-to stay home at some point because of those days, because they understood.

And today is that day for Chloe. But, unlike her children, she had responsibilities-like looking after said children.

She's almost asleep when Beca starts to move her gently down off of her shoulder and then placing the hand, previously on her abdomen, onto the mattress. And Beca's surprised that Chloe's not waking up just a little to say good morning and give her a quick kiss. Not that she ever expected or asked her to, it was just the fact that she had always done that. So, the brunette takes an extra moment to look down at the redhead, just appreciating her because if she can't say it right now at least she knows that she still kinda said good morning psychologically. It makes sense to her, somehow.

Once she's dressed in some nice black jeans and a white long sleeve blouse, Beca finds herself wondering back over to the bed, just to check that Chloe's still out for the count. Which she is. So, gently, she leans down, trying not to shift the mattress too much, and places a kiss on the redhead's forehead. It's a little warmer than usual causing Beca to follow up with her hand, gently stroking her fingers across her forehead and down through her hair. It's not fever warm so Beca decides on texting her, maybe calling, later when she's actually awake and checking in. Chloe lets out a puff of air and moves her head slightly as the brunette tries to escape the mattress causing her to stop every movement and then getting out of the room as quickly and quietly as possible.

It's only 5:30 when Beca eventually closes the doors to the master, turning down the hall to poke her head into each child's room before making her way downstairs for some much-needed coffee.

She grabs a sticky note from the centre island where they-more Chloe than herself-has collected little things such as post it notes apparently and scribbles her note before quickly attaching it to the kettle. Chloe will see it there. She's out the garage door and safely in her car, attempting to warm it up, only a minute after.

Beca had always tried to leave her wife _something_ for when she woke up if the brunette herself wasn't there to greet her for the day ahead. But it wasn't that often that she _had_ to be somewhere this early so most of the time she left a cute note-she tried-and then attempted to text the redhead at around 8 which is when she usually woke up. _Usually._ When it was a school day at least _._ Because she knew her wife well and that involved the non-morning person she is.

So, as predicted by her wife many a time, Chloe's up at 7:56 that morning-well, awake at least. It always happened the same way pretty much every school morning though. Little feet start lazily, with the occasional run happening, trekking up the straight hallway to the double doors and Chloe always thinks she hears the padding of feet but she's never completely sure. She's usually still half asleep at this point. But then-she's confident about this part-the door smooths across the wood flooring, just barely opening, and then the first visitor appears, climbing on the bed and making themselves known. That one's usually Marley. Just like today. Which of course Chloe actually wakes up then-at the sight of her adorable baby how could she not? She's soon followed by Mallory, the younger twin, who climbs in just as easily. If Beca were here, they'd usually climb up on her side and snuggle into her opposite side that the redhead wasn't occupying or occasionally they'd attempt to wedge themselves in between their legs on top of the duvet. But they know that Beca's a bit more reasonable in the morning. They had learned well.

"Hello, you two." It's raspier and not as enthusiastic as she had hoped for, but this morning just isn't okay and she's absolutely not ready to participate in it. Gosh she feels like she's in college all over again.

"Good morning." They say it pretty much in sync, making Chloe smirk just slightly, even though it comes off kind of overwhelming at this time in the morning. You know, having two 4-year olds talk to your barely awake self with a _little_ too much enthusiasm.

"Why don't you guys go watch some tv downstairs and I'll be right down to make you some yummy breakfast." Its more of an instruction than a question, but they both jump of the bed giggling after the redhead gives them both a little poke in the tummy so Chloe's just thankful that they're old enough to navigate themselves, for now.

She rolls onto her back before letting out a puff of air. She needs to get herself together and she needs to do that soon-preferably before she goes downstairs. Her legs swing over the bed before she loses the courage to do so, and she quickly makes her way to their bathroom to get ready for the day.

She decides on some leggings and a hoodie-Beca's of course-and throwing her hair up into a bun, to just be comfortable for the day. She doesn't bother with her contacts, instead grabbing her glasses from her nightstand to wear for the day. Not that she needed them all day. Okay, well maybe she probably did but Chloe was a stubborn being.

As soon as she enters the hallway, she can hear the music coming from the kitchen-Alex must be down there-which wasn't a hard task she supposes. You see, their house was a very open space, something that they wanted specifically when looking for one-with small children it just made life easier. So, the upstairs was just a long, wide, carpeted hallway with three doors either side of it and grand double doors at the far end, opposite the banister that overlooking the living room and partly into the kitchen. Alex, the oldest, had the room next to the stairs – it was one of the biggest and furthest away from her mother's room – they both agreed it was fair to give her that specific room. Opposite her room was Reagan's, the third biggest bedroom in the house which again, both mothers thought he deserved. And then there was Marley's room, 2 doors over from Alex's and right next to Beca and Chloe's room while Mallory's was right next to Reagan's. Which left the other two rooms as spares for visitors. The only thing the mothers knew wasn't okay was the fact that the master, Alex, Reagan and Mallory all had en-suites – an argument they already saw coming from Marley when she figured out that sharing her twin's bathroom wasn't the same.

But poking her head in each room on her way to the stairs, she found none of her kids so that meant they were all downstairs and she could smell pancakes – gosh she loves Alex.

So, she slowly continues down the staircase and through the arch which attaches the living room to the kitchen, leaning against the curved wall there just to take in the sight of her children. Alex was near the oven, singing into the pancake flipper while 'hit me with your best shot' blasts through the speakers. The teenager has obviously lifted the twins onto the island opposite the oven, both fully into the song too because yes, they know every single word apparently. And then Reagan – Reagan never failed to amuse her – he's trying so goddamn hard to dance, Chloe can see it, and its so adorably cute that she just stands there and wishes she could film the whole thing for Beca.

As the song ends, everyone seems to just go back to what they were doing previously – Alex cooking, Reagan's getting something out of the fridge while the two littlest amuse themselves while chatting to Alex about god knows what. It reminds her far too much of a flash dance.

"Look who decided to join us!" Of course, Alex spots her first, always the caring one.

"Mommy!" soon follows from the people that saw her only minutes before.

"Good morning, mom," Alex says as the redhead makes her way over, kissing her forehead and looking down to the frying pan.

"Good morning sweetheart, thank you for cooking, these look great." The brunette only smiles back, giving most of her attention to cooking. Chloe just looks at her for a moment, tucking a strand of hair that had escaped her messy bun behind her ear. The brunette looked a lot like Beca, face wise, but she had picked up things from both mothers. For example, she had Chloe's very shitty eye sight, something Beca was _finally_ catching up with, and they had been told she acquired a mixture of their personality's. She was very friendly, kind, and comforting – Chloe – and then she was also found to be very guarded, silent and not very pleased to be socialising – Beca. But, something she had most definitely picked up from Beca was her hair, god Chloe loved her hair, so much so that she would constantly offer to wash, dry, style or even just run her fingers through the brunette locks to help her relax. And Alex, she was a nerd. A cute nerd. She had a very mixed style but being cute was effortless for the 17-year-old.

Turning around, Chloe sees the other three have made it to the other side of the island to sit on the breakfast stools there. "Good morning Rae," Chloe can see that he's not the happiest – he was a lot like herself when it came to mornings. "Morning, mom," always polite though.

"Breakfast is served," Alex quickly whips around with a stack on pancakes, letting each person take what they wanted, after whipping 2 of the top for herself.

"Guys, you have 10 minutes until you need to leave, okay?" Chloe says, getting apple juice from the fridge for herself – she would eat later. She receives a nod from the oldest two, Marley and Mallory don't seem all that bothered though meaning she had to take a different approach to this.

"You two all ready for school?" She says in a playful tone, resting her elbows on the marble next to Mallory – and yes, she can clearly see they're not, but she still likes to be playful with them.

She gets a 'yep' from Marley and a simple hum from Mallory so she decides to take what she can get.

"Alex, when do you finish today?" This was a daily occurrence, making sure everyone knows when they're supposed to get picked up.

"Umm, 1:30 today for me." The brunette has courses where she has a lot of independent work, meaning a lot of the time she could come home early and work from home.

"Do you think you could pick these two trouble makers up for me?" She asks, squeezing each twins shoulder as she did. "They finish at 1:15," she adds for good measure.

"Yeah, of course mom. You always ask me like I'm going to say no, it's literally right next door its no problem," she glances at Chloe, smile on her face, as she slips of her stool and puts her plate in the sink before disappearing out of the room.

"What about you, baby?"

"Three, I'll have to get the bus home." He didn't seem to care too much about that but still, Chloe thought that was unfair.

"How about you ask your sister really nicely if she can come pick you up at around 3:15, she should be done with her school work then." Chloe thinks that's a good compromise, right?

"I'll ask," he sends Chloe a smirk and follows his sister's path, putting his plate in the sink and disappearing to probably get his bag.

"Okay you two, you need to get dressed come on," she holds her hands out, inviting them to follow as she heads towards the stairs.

They both jump from the stools and run past her, splitting up in the hallway to go to their respective rooms.

"Have a good day, guys, I love you," she gets two kisses on the cheek as the other two rushes past her, down the stairs and shouting 'love you too' before going out to the garage to Alex's car. Chloe simply smiles.

She manages to get the other two dressed and actually in her range rover on time for once, having a lovely conversation between the three of them about whether God was real which Chloe held her point of 'if you want to believe in him, you believe in him with everything you have, it doesn't matter what other people think.' Her and Beca had always made the point to let every one of them know that if they have different beliefs than either mother, it was perfectly fine. So that was her ride there.

The ride back to the house was slightly different. As soon as she manages to climb back into the car after dropping the two off in the building, she just gets this feeling wash over her. Like something heavy's sitting on her chest and she has to work exceptional hard to stop it from crushing her. She just wants to get home, maybe take a nap and try to sleep off this feeling. It's not a feeling she encourages. Ever. And honestly, she thought this had dissipated, had disappeared and would never return. But here she is.

God, she's thankful that she's ahead with her book, because honestly Chloe's not entirely sure if she could write one word today. Especially when she gets home, collapses on the couch with a blanket to cuddle into, the low murmur of the radio and falls into sleep.

It's a couple of hours later when she comes to, feeling worse than ever. She feels sick to her stomach but not in a flu sense, she knows its nothing like that. Deciding that water would probably be the best thing here, she shakily stands and makes her way to the fridge, getting a bottle of water and uncapping it. As she takes a gulp, the clock catches her eye – its 1:15 already. Which meant that the three girls would be back pretty soon. _Crap_.

Risking the stairs, she makes her way to their bedroom, needing to do something since she just had a 3-hour nap. Laundry's a good place to start. That was the plan anyway, until she made it to the bathroom, took one look in the mirror and just complete broke. She's not even sure how it happens. Why it happens. But her glasses are off now as she tries, with no success – like at all – to control her tears. But they're coming at full force whether she likes it or not.

She manages to get a puff of air out, its slow and deep and leaves her feeling even sicker than before but she's just glad she got one. Once she stands there for a couple seconds, breath soon forgotten about, Chloe find's herself twirling around, landing on her knees in front of the toilet and gripping to the porcelain as if it was a life line. A few gags and coughs come out first and then she's throwing up – all while crying of course. She feels like she's starting to lose herself now, like she's not really aware of what's happening around her. It feels foggy and heavy all at once. But she doesn't dare move, she doesn't know what'll happen if she was brave enough for that.

Chloe's struggling to breathe when she feels a hand lightly come up her back, starting to rub it in circles, which only makes her sob more – it meant that someone was seeing her like this. And the worst part? She just _knows_ its Alex.

"Shhh, mom you're okay, you're okay," she leans in close to Chloe's ear to say it, and Chloe congratulates her for getting that close to the toilet honestly.

Alex hears an intake of air from behind her, quickly whipping her head round to see two little bodies, clutched together with hands intertwined.

"What's wrong with mommy?" Alex isn't sure who says it, there's too much happening for her to concentrate on them as Chloe's sobs becoming gags and then eventually more vomit but it seems short enough for Alex to look back at them after Chloe's done.

"Mommy's going to be fine, I promise, but I need you to help, can you do that?" She receives nods immediately of course.

"Okay Mallory I want you to go to the towel cupboard and get the comfiest towel you can find and then grab the big comforter from mom's bed okay? Then bring it back here for me, can you do that?" The girl nods and runs off towards the hallway so Alex takes a moment to glance back at her mother. She's rested her head against her upper arm now, resting on the toilet seat, eyes closed, breathing fast and heavy. "Mar, you see those flannels over there?" She points with her free hand, still not letting the other still on Chloe's back. "I need you to get them both damp, not too wet, one warm and one cold okay?" The girl sets off doing as told so the brunette concentrates on her mother again.

"Mom, how you doing? You okay?" She stays calm, she has no idea if she'll get a reply but she's pretty sure Chloe can hear her. "Yeah, you're okay, don't worry, you're safe."

Mallory returns first, placing the folded towel on the floor next to Alex with the screwed-up blanket on top of it and then Marley's making her way over, placing the cloths in her sisters waiting hand. She places the colder one, folded into a rectangle, on Chloe's neck and then places the other beside her for a moment.

"Well done guys, why don't you go down to the couch and watch a movie? You know how to do that, right?" She's looking at them but still, her hand hasn't left Chloe's back and is still tracing light circles there while the other puts a bit of pressure on the flannel.

They both nod but Alex can see that they don't want to leave, like if they do, somethings going to happen. But they didn't need to see Chloe like this. "Mommy's okay." And then they're off.

She removes the flannel from the redhead's neck, placing it with the other and then uses her free hand to take Chloe's hand, trying to get her mother's attention. But she knew that most likely wasn't going to happen.

"Okay, we're just going to lay down over here for a while," Alex whispers to her, making sure to keep it calm and quiet, she knows that Chloe needs to be told everything happening, even if she acts like she can't hear her. So gently, she lifts Chloe's arm, making her sit up. Her eyes are open now but she's shaking, and tears are still flooding down, even if the sobs have stopped. She moves Chloe to sit on her bottom instead of her knees, where the redhead curls as her knees come to her chest and one hand clutching to her daughter's. Alex quickly pulls the blanket towards her, pushing it to her side, and then helps Chloe lay with her head resting on the towel. It takes slow movements to get the redhead to cooperate and get comfortable. But somehow, Alex manages to get her onto her side, facing the toilet and daughter, and away from the door, blanket over her legs. She leans to put the warmer flannel in between her mother's hands and then places the colder one on her neck again. Chloe's breaths are still fast and heavy – like she has to try so hard just to breathe.

Alex shifts herself to lean against the cabinet next to her mother, stretching and crossing her legs so they end up in between the toilet and Chloe. The redhead's face ends up an inch away from Alex's thigh, but Alex let's her be, slowly smoothing and running her fingers through her mother's hair. Glancing down, checking Chloe was okay, the brunette takes a deep breath and lets her head rest back on the cabinet. She knows that the redhead will come out of it soon, she just had to be patient - she knows that. Beca had taught her that.

Making sure to glance down every couple of minutes to check on her mother, she lets herself relax just slightly. That's until she feels Chloe's thigh softly bump into her own lower leg. If she's moving, that means she's coming out of it-that's what her mom had told her.

So, Alex simply sits and watches her mother, still using her fingers to lightly massage the older woman's scalp, and she can tell that Chloe's almost confused. Her shoulders raise and tense – almost as if she was waking up – and then a few moments later she's resting on her elbow and trying to sit up fully.

Alex quickly helps her, resting a light hand on Chloe's back and helping her up, whispering "I got you," almost subconsciously. And she doesn't move far when Chloe manages to sit cross legged and face her daughter. Tears are still running down her face, but she seems at least partly aware that they're there now. But the worst part for the brunette is that it's so obviously her mother _wants_ to say something but then its also clear that she's struggling and can't.

"Why don't we get you into bed and put some Netflix on?" She makes sure to whisper it and slowly, so Chloe knows she's approaching, settles her hand on the redhead's knee. And that's when tearful eyes meet hers for the first time and Alex thinks it kills her just slightly. Because she can _see_ – and relate – to what her mother feels. And god, she wouldn't wish that on her worst enemy. But she manages to keep a light, comforting smile until Chloe nods and lets Alex help her up and lead her to the bed.

A few minutes later and Chloe's settled against the headboard of their king bed, cuddled into Beca's hoodie and the duvet, with Fuller House on the flat screen above the fireplaces opposite the bed. She can feel herself beginning to get slightly more with it now, if even a little. But she knows that she won't be back to her usual herself for a while yet, probably tomorrow. Panic attacks like that hit her hard, not that she had had one recently. But she's tired and drowsy so honestly? She's just glad Alex is there because there's no way she could look after two 4-year olds right now. She couldn't even take care of herself right now.

So, she lets herself relax a little and shuffles down the bed slightly to lay down a bit more and turns to face Beca's usual side, near the door, letting her eyes close and make her even drowsier than she already seems to be. A few minutes later – at least she thinks it is – the redhead's vaguely aware of the door opening and someone climbing on the bed. She knows it's the oldest of her children, but something convinces her to open her eyes and check, just to make sure. Alex has her phone now, so she can only guess that Beca's been or is going to be notified of this whole ordeal. Slowly, she reaches her hand out of where it was bundled under the duvet and attaches it to her daughters, gently whispering, "don't text mom, I'm fine." And she doesn't know why she does it because she wants Beca more than anything right now but she's also aware that her wife only has these meetings once a month and she couldn't just call her out of them when it wasn't an emergency. So, with that, she keeps her hand clasped around the brunette's and lets herself fall into sleep.

Alex watches as her mother's breath evens out and her hand goes limp around her own, but she keeps her hand around Chloe's. With her right hand she uses her phone to text her brother and tell him to get the bus home – it was 2:53 now – just in time, but she hesitates when looking at her mom's picture on her imessages menu. She wanted to text her, wanted her to come home and help Chloe, comfort her more than anything, just so she can be okay again. But the redhead told her not to and even though she didn't actually reply Chloe knew her answer. So, she sits and waits for something to happen – preferably for Beca to come home early for once – but she knew that was highly unlikely. She knows that the twins are okay – they have the tv and she quickly gave them a snack while getting her phone and they were sensible enough to come get her if they wanted anything – so she lets herself relax just a little.

Brown eyes dart to the door, away from the tv which yes, still had Fuller House playing, to see the only male in the house, giving her a confused and scared expression. The poor guy was only 12, 5 years younger than her own shit scared self, but then again, he didn't witness the state the redhead was in only an hour before. At least she was calm and asleep now.

"What happened? Marley said that mom was crying and sick…" he starts of in his normal voice, but Alex quickly shuts that down with a quick finger to her lips. But she doesn't really know what exactly to tell him, she doesn't know how far she should take this.

"She had a panic attack, but she's okay now, it's over. She's just tired and a bit out of it, I promise." It still doesn't rid the expression from his face, but he takes a few steps towards her, just to check, to look at her face from where it's buried in the duvet and make sure she truly was okay. Alex watches him for a second, she sees the acceptance in his face as he looks at her – he believes she's okay for now – and then he's turning to face his sister, asking, "is there anything I can do?"

She knows she has to responsible now. She has to play the mom until Beca gets home. "Yeah, go downstairs and check on the twins okay? They'll probably be thirsty by now, so can you help them out with that?..." she waits for the nod, "Okay, and then I need you to sit down there and do your homework," and that's when the nodding stops, and the glare comes out. "Reagan I'm serious you need to do your homework or it's just going to stress mom _and_ mama out when they have to help you catch up," he seems to accept it and mumbles an "okay," before walking away and pulling the door until it's open just a crack.

It's at least an hour and a half later, Alex guesses it's about 5, when the door opens again and god Alex thanks the upper power for who appears. Beca looks concerned before she even catches sight of her wife, but the brunette can tell that its not just her wife she's concerned about.

"Hey, what happened? You okay?" Beca knows to whisper, unlike her son, and approaches Alex's – or Beca's – side of the bed.

"I don't know I came home and she was throwing up and crying…I guessed it was a panic attack. I did what you told me to and she seemed to calm down eventually." Beca could see the glassy eyes of her oldest as she takes the brunettes hand in hers and squeezes, all while pressing a light kiss to her forehead.

"It's okay, don't worry mom's gonna be fine I promise. I know it's scary to see her like that, are you okay?"

"Yeah I umm I think so."

"Okay, why don't you go to your room and relax a little? Everyone else is taken care of, you need to take care of you now, okay?" Beca guides her daughter off the bed and walks her down the hall to her own room.

"Okay mama, love you," Alex whispers before making her way into her own room.

"Love you too, it's pasta for dinner alright?" Receiving a nod, Beca peers over the balcony quickly into the living room, just to make sure, but of course, the girls are curled up on the sofa watching frozen and Raegan, bless his soul, was keeping a watchful eye from the kitchen island – Beca could _just_ about see his book on the marble counter.

God, she had amazing kids.

But right now, right now she needed to turn her attention towards her wife. Because Chloe hadn't had a panic attack like the one Alex described since said child was about 10 – 7 years ago. So, Beca's ultimate question wasn't what had caused it – she knows that Chloe can't answer that – but why now? And sure, Chloe probably can't answer that either but maybe the brunette herself can. Her wife hadn't been anymore stressed than usual recently so that was out of the question, and she hadn't informed Beca on feeling anxious lately. And she would have told Beca. That was after Beca saw the signs 5 minutes before hand. So, as Beca crawls under the duvet next to her wife, door left open _just_ a crack, she decides to just try to prevent it from happening again. Especially when she wasn't around.

Gently, she moves the redhead until she's half on Beca, head on her shoulder and arm resting around her waist while the brunette traces patterns on her back and smirks when her wife curls into her a little more. She knows she can't stay long, their children need food and to actually get to bed at a reasonable time – even if it was a Friday. It's already 5:30 – the time dinner's usually just getting served up and they're getting ready to sit at the table together. But not today. So, yeah Beca knows she had to go do that soon but she tells herself she'll go at the end of this episode – because, yes Fuller House is _still_ playing on that tv.

"Becs," gets whispered minutes later, and Beca slowly looks down to meet Chloe's drowsy eyes.

"Hey, babe."

"How was your day?" Beca actually almost laughs at that. Here her wife is, half asleep and basically out of it and she's asking about her day.

"My day was fine, don't worry about that right now, okay? How are you doing?"

There's silence for a minute, and Chloe's just nuzzling her head into Beca to get closer and whispering, "I don't know," because she really, truly, didn't.

"That's okay, Chlo, I'm here," Beca just pulls Chloe into her body and hugs her tight for a minute.

They lay there for a couple minutes, Beca's pretty sure her wife's asleep again until she's whispering, "can you ask my mom to look after the kids tonight?" And it takes Beca off guard. Simply because she hadn't realised it was that bad – bad enough for Chloe to need her without distraction. Her wife wouldn't have asked unless she felt it was needed, and then some, so Beca nods, tells Chloe to go to sleep, gives her a kiss and leaves the room.

After clicking the door shut with as little sound as possible, Beca makes her way downstairs, seeing the girls still concentrated on their movie, and Reagan had now joined them. She sticks to the plan of pasta, knowing it's a family favourite and she's gonna have a hard-enough time getting Chloe to eat as it is.

As she's putting the meatballs in the pan, she dials Cindy, Chloe's mom, to do the very thing her wife had asked her. Of course, it only rings twice before she hears the overly happy, "hello."

"Hi Cindy, it's Beca," she says as she adds the pasta to the pan, trying to balance the phone in-between her shoulder and ear.

"Hi honey, how is everyone?"

"The kids are okay yeah, I was just ringing to ask if you could have Marley, Mallory and Reagan tonight?" For what, she didn't want to mention but of course, the woman's going to ask – its not that often that they ask Cindy to spontaneously have the kids.

"Yes of course I can, everything alright?"

"Umm kinda, Chloe had a panic attack while I was at work – a pretty bad one – and she was crying and throwing up, so I think she needs my attention right now. She actually asked me to call you," she tries to keep her voice low, she knows that Reagan could probably hear if he paid enough attention.

"Oh god, okay sweetheart, I'll be right over okay?" Beca can tell that the older woman knows she's shaken up, the way she says it so calmly and comforting says that loud and clear. But Chloe did the exact same and honestly? It was nice to hear that comfort every now and then when you needed it most.

"Okay, thank you Cindy."

The next ten minutes are a rush of wrestling the twins – and Raegan – into the kitchen, all while trying to plate dinner up and get them to _actually_ eat. Usually, they were all good eaters, always had been, but tonight wasn't _usually._ And of course, she puts the pan in the slightly heated oven for the oldest three residents of the house – because no she herself wasn't eating yet either.

"Guys, finish eating while I go pack a bag for grandmas okay?...Buddy, can you pack your own bag, or do you want me to do it?" She aims the last question at the oldest of the three, hoping he would say she could do it – her son had a tendency to take a while.

"You, please," its said with a mouth full of food and a wave of a fork in her direction but she nods anyway and hurries up the stairs. She decides to leave her daughter and wife to rest for a minute – she could tell Alex was exhausted – and quickly goes about room to room, making sure to get all three bags. But, gosh, was packing a kids bag hard, not for the clothes part – Beca has that down pat – but for the other things like their favourite teddy or Raegan's iPad; if one thing was forgotten it could cause chaos.

But somehow, she manages it in record time and places all 3 back packs at the front door just as the bell dings. Opening it, she sees a flash of red hair before being engulfed by long arms and feeling the all too familiar sooth of a hand on her back.

"You okay?" gets whispered as Cindy pulls back, holding Beca at arm's length. And the brunette nods because no they weren't great, but they could handle it. They were okay.

"Where's my beautiful grandchildren?"

Ten minutes later and there's only 3 of them left in the house, so Beca plates up 3 portions of food on 2 plates, makes 3 cups of tea, puts everything on a tray, and heads upstairs. She just about manages a knock-on Alex's door without dropping everything, hearing a quiet "yeah" and then turning the handle with her little finger that she had left free – which, yes, hurt like a bitch.

"Hey, I brought you some food," the brunette places the tray on her daughter's desk, taking one plate and the cup of tea, in Alex's mug of course, over to the girl curled up in the corner of her couch, blanket draped over her and an open book dropped to her lap. "You don't have to eat it all but as much as you can please," Beca adds at the face she gets from the thought of food.

"Thank you…how's mom?"

"Mom's okay right now, don't worry. The other three are at grandma's – I figured you wouldn't want to go – so as long as you're okay I'm gonna go look after her, okay?" Beca gets a nod so she moves to get up from where she had plopped herself next to Alex on the couch. "But if you need anything, and I mean anything, then you know where we are." And with that, she leaves her daughter in peace, grabbing the tray and making her way to her wife.

The redhead's fast asleep when she enters, curled into the middle, surrounded by pillows like always. Beca thinks it's the cutest thing ever, obviously, and can't help but smile at her wife as the tray lands on the bedside table.

"Chloe," the brunette whispers, a hand placed on her wife's back, when she's made it halfway into Chloe's cocoon, choosing to sit up against the headboard. She only watches as the redhead's nose twitches and her hand lets go of the duvet to search for Beca's, the one that wasn't soothing her back of course. And eventually, after several – okay, probably more than several – hand squeezes and kisses later, blue eyes appear and are gladly welcomed by a comforting smile.

Chloe just looks up at her wife, not really sure what she ever did to deserve Beca, but she can see the slight worry behind the eyes and how Beca's smile doesn't quite sit right. And Chloe knows its because of her – she's fully aware of that. And she still feels out of it, like she's here but in a fog or daze. And she's not sure what to do about that either.

"You okay to sit up?" She nods. Because yes, she's okay to do it but ask if she wants to and that's a completely different story for you. But she's also aware that Beca's worried and she should probably put as much effort as possible into stopping that whole situation. That starts when she spots the tray of food and smiles because of course Beca's brought food with her, what else could she expect from her?

"For you, my dear," Beca brings the plate over onto her own lap, looking at Chloe expectantly and knowing full well that her wife had no interest whatsoever in it. But Chloe knows she knows. Which makes the whole refusing to eat thing hard and…eug she just doesn't want to take part but God Beca's looking at her like _that,_ like she needs Chloe to do this and eug!

So, when Beca holds out a fork for her a second later, she takes it. And when Beca gently moves the plate towards her, she eats a little. Twenty minutes later, it's somehow all gone, admittedly mostly consumed by Beca but whatever, Chloe ate and that's an achievement so…

Chloe's kind of slowly slid down the bed when Alex cracks the door open a couple hours later, making eye contact with Chloe from where she's sunken into Beca. "Hi honey." Chloe looks up after saying it, seeing her wife half asleep against the headboard. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I just wanted to come and say goodnight."

"Well goodnight sweetheart, you know where we are if you need us," she hears her daughter, and wife at that, mutter a goodnight before starting to close the door again, "wait, Alex come back…thank you for helping me today, I know it probably wasn't easy for you and I'm sorry."

At that, Alex was straight into the bedroom, heading for the bottom of the bed to crawl up it. "Mom it's not your fault, trust me I get it. Yeah it was hard and not nice for anyone, especially you, but everyone's okay and I think that's the overall goal with things like this."

Gosh. Okay, Chloe may be an emotional mess and everything but that…oh man that hit her hard. "I'm so proud of you, you know that? You're truly amazing Alex and don't let anyone tell you different okay?" She receives a quick nod, a kiss to the cheek and a "goodnight mom," before Alex shuts the door and heads to her own bed. All Chloe can do is take a deep breath and think about how awesome her kids are.

She eventually realises it's 11 already and Beca's really not in a suitable sleeping position god damn it but she's comfy and eug! But she loves her wife and everything so once she's rolled off of Beca and convinced the brunette to move, admittedly very reluctantly, she snuggles back in to her wife's arms and prepares herself for tomorrow.


End file.
